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Divorce law - a disaster?

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14 Oct 09 #154583 by D L
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Gargoyle, since last summer I only do free work - the majority through this site, but some pro bono elsewhere. I am waiting for you to get back to the debate you claim you want to have.

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14 Oct 09 #154598 by Gargoyle
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DivorceLawyer wrote:

Gargoyle, since last summer I only do free work - the majority through this site, but some pro bono elsewhere. I am waiting for you to get back to the debate you claim you want to have.



But isn't this hijacking another thread which has nothing to do with my digression of Pre-nups...?

I did try starting another thread but you stopped it.

What else am I to do?

I thought it only fair to the OP that I took this discussion to somewhere else, ho hum.

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14 Oct 09 #154638 by maggie
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I'm not sure pre-nups are a solution - the first thing I'd want to know before signing one is what would I get if I divorced him without a pre-nup - ie I'd be off to a solicitor asking what would be a good deal and building in some contingency?
The FDR would move forward to become part of the wedding preparations?

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14 Oct 09 #154642 by elvis_fan
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Hi Gargoyle, Amanda, and others,

My personal feeling is that prenuptial agreements are unlikely to reduce the divorce rate by acting as a deterrent for divorce for people once they are married. They might impact the number of people who get married in the first place - deterring the very small number of people who get married as gold-diggers.

However, I do support the idea of prenuptial agreements, as I think in the small number of cases where they would apply they will reduce tying up court time and lining solicitors pockets. I don't think they'd apply in the majority of cases on forums like this, where there is often only just adequate assets to re-house the family unit once it's been split into two, and where there are children of the marriage involved whose needs have to be considered as a priority. But for later marriages, short marriages with a strong imbalance of assets, childless marriages, etc, they seem like a good idea.

Gargoyle - just to back up Amanda's comments; regardless of whether or not you think you're in the right in this and other threads - it would help if you could reflect on what it is about your approach to posting on the forum that seems to be creating so much animosity. Personally, my first impression was that you were 'trolling' on here just to stir things up, but from reading a number of your more positive posts on here, it seems more likely that you're genuine in your intention. However, when certain buttons get pushed for you (primarily around contact issues for fathers, which is understandably a very difficult topic for you) the tone of your threads often becomes quite different and often sarcastic. You also seem very defensive about people disagreeing with you, and very critical of others who hold a different perspective. Ultimately it only seems likely to serve to alienate you regarding the very issue you most need support and concern from others about. If you can give a little more thought about your posts, and take responsibility for your own difficult feelings, you might find that you get more of what might be helpful to you from the forum. I would certainly welcome the opportunity for you and I to be less adversarial in future posts.

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