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Moving abroad

  • Stressedout.com
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09 Jul 12 #342041 by Stressedout.com
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Hi,
I split up with my ex husband nearly two years ago. We are now divorced. I''m Polish and he''s British. Our three children have dual nationality.
I want to move back to Poland but although he said he was ok about it, now he demands that I bring them to the UK every so often and that he wants to visit them every month and he reckons that he doesn''t need to pay maintenance as we won''t be living in the UK.
I can''t afford solicitor. I have lots of debts because I was the only one who was working for 90% of our marriage. I paid £5000 for the divorce and still owe nearly 3000 to my solicitor. He tried his best to cost me as much money as he could. I am not entitled to legal aid as I earn £25000 per year.
What can I do to be able to move to Poland with my children? What things do I need to agree to? Does he have to pay maintenance while I am abroad? How often is he entitled to visit them?
Thanks x

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09 Jul 12 #342044 by rubytuesday
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Welcome to Wikivorce.

If your ex isn''t agreeable to the move, you will need to apply to the Courts for Leave to Remove.

Its not unreasonable for him to insist on arrangements being agreed upon for him to see the children after the move. I would suggest you put together a detailed proposal for continuing contact, including indirect contact (ie phone calls, Skype video calls, etc), and how often the children will see their father, and who will pay for that.

He will still be required to financially support his children, even if they are living in a different country, although he can request that his travel and associated costs for travelling to see the children are taken into account.

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09 Jul 12 #342057 by Stressedout.com
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I don''t mind him
Seeing the kids once every 6/8 weeks. I also don''t mind them coming to England in summer holidays. I don''t mind them speaking to their dad on the telephone or Internet.
The thing that I mind is paying for flights. I will be earning £300 per month over there. It''s only because my parents will let us live in their house that would enable us to survive. I won''t be able to afford to buy flights for the kids.
Another thing is that the kids don''t really like seeing their dad as he''s not a nice person to them. He shouts at them all the time. They only go to see him so that he doesn''t shout at me.
How much would it cost me to apply for the leave to remove thing?

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09 Jul 12 #342111 by Chained
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Wait a minute!

So, you don''t mind him doing this or that with the children but the children do not want to talk to him or seeing him because his behavior is not good.

Then maybe you should mind. Or is this another way to try to deny contact arrangements being made on the premiss that he is unsuitable to be with them and THEY don''t want him?

If my ex husband''s behavior was so bad that his own son didn''t want to be with him then I would address the issue differently.

Anyway, a Leave to Remove is needed and there you will have to elaborate on that matter, too.

How much it costs, no idea, but... if you consider moving your children away from their father then this is one of the prices you will have to pay.

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09 Jul 12 #342127 by Stressedout.com
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I don''t mind him
Seeing the kids once every 6/8 weeks. I also don''t mind them coming to England in summer holidays. I don''t mind them speaking to their dad on the telephone or Internet.
The thing that I mind is paying for flights. I will be earning £300 per month over there. It''s only because my parents will let us live in their house that would enable us to survive. I won''t be able to afford to buy flights for the kids.
Another thing is that the kids don''t really like seeing their dad as he''s not a nice person to them. He shouts at them all the time. They only go to see him so that he doesn''t shout at me.
How much would it cost me to apply for the leave to remove thing?

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09 Jul 12 #342146 by Emma8485
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What contact arrangements are already in place ?

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09 Jul 12 #342152 by Stressedout.com
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He has them one afternoon after school and one full weekend and one Saturday or Sunday.
He''s not nice to them. That''s why they don''t like going. Sometimes I will ask him whether kids could stay at home as they don''t want to go... Then the hell begins... Kids see how much stress I''m put under because if their dad and in a way I know they try to protect me. However sometimes they just don''t want to go and then they stay at home.

Once he shouted into their faces in front of me saying that he doesn''t want to see them ever again as they behave like little b*******

He''s been very abusive towards me for last two years. Not physically but emotionally. Moving to Popand is me trying to escape really. We have better standard of living over here but I will go mental before I''m 30 if I don''t move away.

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