Taking kids abroad!

Does the wife have to have my permission to take the kids abroad for a holiday?

Yes, if you have PR and she doesn''t have a residence order. That said, she can get away with taking them if you withhold consent unreasonably.

Best wishes,
Sadie

I have booked to take my kids abroad this week. We are supposed to be going for a week and obviously have return tickets. My stbx sent an e-mail on sunday saying he now forbids me to do so and has contacted H.M. Customs, so I will be stopped at the airport. Is this possible? Can he do this?

I don''t know why I find this funny as really obviously the agony of it all is not.

However, I recall during the first year of my separation and divorce I went to pick our youngest up from school (before I was prevented from picking him up - another story) anyway I then found out he had been taken out of school at lunchtime and was on holiday abroad with his father and new partner.

I was, to say the least distaught not least as me and our daughter had been waiting in the car in the playground for 20 minutes wondering where on earth he was.

Anyhow, I decided not to bother too much about it as a few months earlier stbx had told me he wanted to talk the children on holiday and asked me for the passports which were still with me in the FMH.

So, I sent them over to him via my daughter and asked where they were going. Daughter told me the country and I asked for the resort and flight times primarily because the country was experiencing civil unrest and I was a bit concerned but also as I was still a bit sore about stuff and I wanted to know the airport and the flights just in case anything came up on the news.

So, I asked my solicitor to write a letter as a letter from me had gone no-where. Anyway ex-s response was that he was not telling me because if he did I might phone up the hotel he was staying at and cause trouble!!!

I can just imagine it now, "hello, my name is Mrs Soulruler and I know that you have my stbx husband Mr Soulruler there and if you do not submit to my demands right now I am going to come over there and blow up your property"

Response from the hotel receptionist being phone down that was a raving lunatic.

Anyway I would ask Northernboy what do you need your wife to ask permission for a week or twos holiday and to the other poster your ex sounds like a control freak.

I would imagine that HM Customs have better things to do than apprehend a mother and children who are going on holiday for a week (presumably in Europe not some far flung and dodgy destination).

Do you think that you ex is going to alledge that you are into people smuggling or getting drugs out of the country?

Sorry, I know it is stressful having gone through it so many times myself.

These days having seen my ex and his wife and youngest son seemingly on a permanent trip to far flung places I have given up even worrying about parental responsibility and being told if something does happen to my youngest.

They have absolutely no interest in me, what would happen if an accident did happen abroad and I am not even mentioned on the parental responsibility form which my ex filled in when my son transferred school.

I had to give proof that I was my sons mother by producing a certified copy of his birth certificate in order to get a copy of his school report.

Angie19, It''s probably just a threat but if he has convinced the authorities there is a flight risk the authorities can put out an all ports warning to prevent you from leaving the country. Rather than risk the potential hassle you could apply to court for permission to go abroad and an emergency hearing.

You would need to go to the court, fill in the application forms for a Specific Issue Order and a without notice hearing, pay the court fees and be prepared to hang about all day until a judge has 5 minutes to hear you. Take any papers such as copies of existing contact/residence orders, any written evidence that your ex had agreed to the holiday, tickets and any information about travel arrangements and where you are staying.

As I have one day before we go, I can''t see this happenning! I don''t even know for sure if he has actually done anything as, yes, he is a control freak and also a liar.
Does anyone know if I would be informed in any way if he has actually done this? Would H M Csutoms contact me? He would probably alledge that I will be attempting to emigrate with them.

Please - is there a lawyer out there who knows for sure - I''m freaking out here!!!

I am not sure about the protocol but I think if he wanted to stop you taking the kids he would need to apply for something called a prohibative steps order - ? Fiona will know for sure.

Anyway, if he knows where you are going the idea of him contacting HM Customs and them taking him seriously with the hideous work load they are under with drugs and illegal imigrants etc - well seems highly unlikely to me.

Surely there has to be some common sense here and a customs officer wouldn''t want to see children crying and being stopped from a weeks holiday with Mum just because and angry man demanded you are not having fun.

Perhaps you should take the threatening e-mail with you in your bag just in case and show the short notice that he has given you and the lack of thought and care for you and your children.

I really can''t believe it would happen but perhaps when you get back you can post on here and give us wikis some faith (or shock) as to what did happen in the end.