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6 year old upsetting comments

  • oceanlava
  • oceanlava's Avatar Posted by
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07 May 20 #512319 by oceanlava
Topic started by oceanlava

So last December after a year in court we came to an agreement in final hearing for a child arrangements order for our 2 girls age 3 and 6 (4 in June, 7 in July).

The children live with me for 6 days out of 14. This was exactly what i was after and CAFCASS were in full support.

So now only 5 months after it being in place my eldest is saying all kinds of upsetting things with the most hurtful this morning when she said "when i'm 12 i get to choose where i want to live and i'm going to live with mummy. We are going to live in a big house." When i asked why she is saying this she said "that is when the courts will listen to me". Now this is really upsetting me as they are happy when they're here and we have fun together so it sucks that she appears to be counting down to a time when she doesn't have to live with me :(

Does anyone have any advice on this? Is this something that will likely/hopefully change by the time she hits age 12? How do i deal with these comments? Also appears like parental alienation to me as prior to me deciding to leave my ex i had a very good bond with my daughter.

Any thoughts welcome.


  • WYSPECIAL's Avatar
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09 May 20 #512345 by WYSPECIAL
Reply from WYSPECIAL
Just carry on being a good parent and don't say anything negative about it.

If you just confirm that as parents you will both always love them and they'll always be able to spend time with both of you.

From your post they are already living with your ex more than 50% of the time but you tend to find that as kids get older the arrangements change naturally to suit them without any need for court intervention.

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