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Self Repping

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14 Apr 12 #323610 by khan72
Topic started by khan72
Hi Everyone,

I am having a rather one-sided acrymonious divorce. Keep on asking for mediation and getting refused :(

Child matters - I am self repping

Story so far - (F)Father, (M)Mother, (C)Child
F was going to divorce M based on M keeping C away. An abnormal relationship. F asked M for counselling. M refused. F ask M''s relatives to mediate. M refused and M''s relatives told me that there was nothing they could do as M being unreasonable. F sent divorce petition and told M everything as he was open. M knew divorce was on the cards for many weeks prior. F was at work one day and got a NonMol and a huge affidavit full of accusations from M.
F didnt see C for ages, got depressed. F finally went to a first D hearing where he gets pounced upon with a notice with yet more allegations including drug use. F agrees to drug test if M pays. M says no. F agree to pay for eveything if +ve and that M should pay if its -ve. M says no. F has to undergo supervised contact. Judge asks for all of Ms allegations (a complete set for the second Directions hearing). Judge orders F take a drugs test and contact is strictly supervised. M also alleges that F''s brother is a paedo. Judge Orders a CAFCASS section 7...
Drug test arrives all clear. (as expected ;)). Cafcass interviews F and M seprately. F asks cafcass to do a enhanced check on his brother as initial check came in as "all clear". M adds yet more allegations (contrary to judgement as deadline had passed). Cafcass recommends supervised contact and fact finding. F was like OMG!!
:ohmy:. F asks Cafcass lady why. Cafcass lady explains that its up to a judge to find fact and if anyone is found to be lying, then judge and cafcass will ignore/give less weight to future allegations and that a fact finding will push things ahead at a faster pace.

sometime, in the not so distant past, F had a hearing a court. F''s barrister is a badass dude who wrote an excellent case summary and background. The barrister also wrote a mini scott schedule. Judge loved it. Judge struck out some petty allegations and asked M''s barrister to give a set of allegations in scott schedule format which were pertinent to child matters only. F''s barrister reminded judge of initial judges ruling for M to give all her allegations a while back. Judge said M can make allegations if she wishes. F was nodding in the courtroom as F realised that M only brings down her own case by bringing in more lies. Judge points out to F''s barrister that F was nodding his head. :). F wants M to make bagloads of allegations. Judge ordered that M make a complete list of allegations on a scott schedule in 5 weeks. further 3 weeks for F to reply then another directions hearing where the scott schedule will be examined. Judge tore into M''s barrister as he could not get a full set of new allegations in scott schedule format in two hours. F''s barrister knew that M''s barrister was peaved at M for pulling yet more last minute stuff.:P

F wanted more contact. Judge will deal with more contact at next Directions. F is really pleased he didnt make any allegations :)F doesn''t have sleepless nights now as F has seen a lady judge support F in getting better contact. Judge blasted M''s barrister for not being open to increasing contact hours. :).

F has told his barrister he will be taking on child matter by himself. Barrister told F he knew F was innocent and that self repping is not all that bad. Barri gave F a lot of self rep advice and wished him the best. :).

F now comes to forum for help in understanding stuff on self repping.
F also bought a womnderful book on Littigant in person etc. F is enjoying the read. :)

Hi everyone. Please help. :)

PS After 1st directions i was really upset. treated like a criminal. Now at the 2nd hearing, new judge actually looked at evidences (lack of) and saw some of my attachmens disproving her allegations and was not impressed. Judge actually supported me. Lesson here for all men. Work with Cafcass and the system. Do not make any false allegations. If they are petty, keep them out of court. I have zero allegations against STBX. My scott schedule is zero lines. I am self repping now as basically even if all her allegations against me were to be found as fact, i would still get supported access. how silly will she look putting in serious allegations against me so late in the day?
Honesty and integrity....saved my buns :)

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14 Apr 12 #323613 by khan72
Reply from khan72
To all those dads out there that did nothing wrong. I was distraught and depressed for 4 months. Didnt sleep. went from 110kg to 87kg.
Do not get drawn in to this asymmetric psychological warfare. Tell yourself you wil remain honest and keep your integrity. In the long run, a good judge can tell BS when they read it. Trust me, you will not have to do anything other than sit back and watch the show... most likely her Barrister will be getting a beating or be on the back foot.
The system does not seem to work at first, Just let the wheels warm up.:laugh:

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