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Unfair Hearing! Is this allowed?

  • Rapture
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18 Apr 12 #324631 by Rapture
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Hi all,

Would be extremely grateful for your input into my Shared res case (apologies for the long post)

Put in an app earlier last year for SRO and half of hols.

Turned up to first hearing and spoke to CAFCASS, was informed ex agreed to sharing of hols but not shared res and stated a child welfare allegation against my wife of approx 10 months prior.
Judge advised Cafcass hadn''t carried out clearance checks and referred it for another Directions hearing with statements and to a judge who has been involved in our heairng of appox 2 years prior.

Went to the second directions hearing, clearance checks carried out by CAFCASS highlighted no concerns. Spoke to cafcass again, ex brings up this child welfare allegation again and the judge referrs it to a final hearing and requests my wife gives consent for a clearnce check to be carried out her to satisfy ex''s concerns.

4 months later, we turn up to final hearing today with a different judge, just as I sit down am told by the judge "the law says there must be continuity and previous judge should be hearing this case not her". Also cafcass haven''t carried out clearnace checks on my wife.
Then suggests there should be Cafcass involvemnt and child should be spoken to.

Speaks to me and ex and suggests cafcass involvement or a hearing today which in no uncertain terms will she agree to SRO even if I prove my case!

I suggest it''s referred back to previous judge as no other judge has suggested cafcass involvement and she agrees but states to ex she will impress that cafcass involvment is carried out!

What the hell is going on here? Is it me or are these bigots having a laugh?

  • khan72
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19 Apr 12 #324881 by khan72
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Take it on the chin. Be calm. Do not lose it. I remember my first appearance. Both parties agreed supported. Judge and CAFCASS recommended supervised. Ex realised this and asked for supervised. The next time i went to court i had hard evidence of my hair strand test. Believe me, lies will come out in the wash :)Have patience. If you made any allegation, ensure you have hard proof or do not make any allegations whatsoever. Judges do not care about you vs ex. Make sure the judge only concentrates on Child Act matters. You with your child. Judges are not stupid they see right through a situation and know how to corner people in Directions. Thats been my experience anyway. Once they corner a party, the other will get more access than they ask for :)Patience. Don''t lose hope.

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19 Apr 12 #324888 by WhiteRose
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khan72 wrote:

Take it on the chin. Be calm. Do not lose it. I remember my first appearance. Both parties agreed supported. Judge and CAFCASS recommended supervised. Ex realised this and asked for supervised. The next time i went to court i had hard evidence of my hair strand test. Believe me, lies will come out in the wash :)Have patience. If you made any allegation, ensure you have hard proof or do not make any allegations whatsoever. Judges do not care about you vs ex. Make sure the judge only concentrates on Child Act matters. You with your child. Judges are not stupid they see right through a situation and know how to corner people in Directions. Thats been my experience anyway. Once they corner a party, the other will get more access than they ask for :)Patience. Don''t lose hope.


Excellent advice Khan.

Rapture keep calm, maintain child focus, take all they throw at you - be squeaky clean. The authorities have to dredge through the lies to get to the truth and you don''t want to give her anything she can use as ammunition against you.

Like Khan says - have patience and think long term - you''ll get there in the end! Just this week we''ve had a good news contact story here on Wiki:

www.wikivorce.com/divorce/Divorce-Advice...ing-is-all-over.html

Have hope

WR

  • Emma8485
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19 Apr 12 #324934 by Emma8485
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Thank you WR - we are famous!

On a serious note, Mum in this case dragged us through the mud for a year, alleged all sorts of things - they were all disproved - the judge wasnt nice to her on Monday I can assure you, and the Cafcass officer found she had caused emotional harm to the daughter in this case, and she has 6 months now to prove she can change or my partner gets residence,

the courts have to listen to the crap - and thats all it amounts to - everything has to be proven or disproven - every time they allege something new, come up with the proof as to why its not true. It takes time, patience and at times you and your wife will fall out - I say this from experience!

But I can promise you having been on a high since Monday afternoon - its worth it - in 24 hours we are going to have my partners little girl back with us and we cant wait

take care
xx

  • Rapture
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20 Apr 12 #325190 by Rapture
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Thank you all for your kind and supportive words... they really do make a difference...I know what I need to do but it''s hard and even harder when you''ve been doing it for 8 years! (you''d think I''d be used to it by now!)

Well done and congracts Emma...stories like yours and Khan''s do provide hope!

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20 Apr 12 #325361 by khan72
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Rapture... my story is at the begining. 2nd Directions so far. Dropped my solicitor. Dropped my barrister. Reading books on law.
Its my personal journey. Lets see how it goes. :)
Keep faith.

  • Mark100
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28 Apr 12 #327032 by Mark100
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Guys

You give me hope. I must admist my health isn''t great with all of this worry. I tacked it as soon as I could but the system has really put my kids in a dreadful position.

Once an order is in place - ex has Residence and I have Contact - is there anything I can do?

How long before I can apply for more nights, etc?

Ex has taken my happy boy at 7 to being angry a lot of the time and much less happy. He''s also starting to not trust and I understand why. My daughter seems ok.

I am not ok!

How do you manage to detach yourselves to deal with the courts and their solicitors?

I had representation and I was still upset in there.

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