A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

position statements

  • Annie1000
  • Annie1000's Avatar Posted by
  • Premium Member
  • Premium Member
More
08 May 12 #329248 by Annie1000
Topic started by Annie1000
Would welcome some views on the following please.
Have finally received position statement from grandmother. It is 19 pages long, 54 pages, itemise''s my shortcomings, repeats my shortcomings and then goes over them again for good measure!
She denies what she wrote in solicitor''s letters, so have forwarded them to the court. Have been warned that as they do not have much of a case they will go for character assassination. Will they get to do this to me as a L.I.P?
I''m really worried now.

  • hadenoughnow
  • hadenoughnow's Avatar
  • Moderator
  • Moderator
More
08 May 12 #329250 by hadenoughnow
Reply from hadenoughnow
Annie

The more they write, the more they trip themselves up .. and the more they irritate the judge. The judge will not allow her to descend into slagging you off ...

You just need to keep your cool, be dignified yet bemused by her vitriol and point to the evidence .. without actually calling her a liar. Just be sure that everything you say and do is underlining your concern for your daughter, her well-being and her relationship with her father - challenging though that is.

You are very nearly there ... stay strong.

Hadenoughnow

  • Annie1000
  • Annie1000's Avatar Posted by
  • Premium Member
  • Premium Member
More
08 May 12 #329299 by Annie1000
Reply from Annie1000
Hi
Thank you,I think I can stay calm, I am used to doing that for work!
I wonder if anyone has experience of this type of questioning and what I will be asked.Is it focused on contact or will they try to discredit me as a person?
She knows so little about me I can''t imagine that will be possible.
Also she would not talk to CAFCASS, so maybe that will count against her.
If things go well tomorrow, I imagine they will try to get it straight back to court.
The worst thing she accuses me of is verbally abusing ex but his carer is there all the time, so how would it be possible?

  • hadenoughnow
  • hadenoughnow's Avatar
  • Moderator
  • Moderator
More
08 May 12 #329305 by hadenoughnow
Reply from hadenoughnow
Annie

I had this experience at FH for finances - but not done child contact stuff. His barrister tried a character assassination but failed. The judge actually seemed to be on my side ... and at the end described me as "an impressive lady"!
I am sure you will be able to stand up to anything she tries to throw at you ... I am also sure the judge will not be persuaded by arguments about your alleged character failings. You and your daughter have both been through the mill enough. You have done your best to keep contact going despite the appalling circumstances and these dreadful grandparents. What will shine through is your concern for your daughter and their utter selfishness.
I wish you the very best. Stay calm. The end is in sight.

Hadenoughnow

  • gotmysmile
  • gotmysmile's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
08 May 12 #329330 by gotmysmile
Reply from gotmysmile
Annie - this is just a thought. Have you thought of asking the court to make your daughter party to the proceedings? If so, she would be appointed a court (legal aid) solicitor to represent her.

When I was going through contact proceedings, this happened and as I self repped, the solicitor for the children often stepped in when ex was going for it! The DJ asked his opinion on matters when we had different accounts etc.

If I recall, your daughter is 11/12?? So this would not be unusual?? She will NOT need to attend court, but mine discussed matters with their solicitor in private meetings both at home and in his office.

I may be wrong, this may not be suitable in your case but it''s just a thought as it appears your daughter is not being listened to by the gp/court.

GMS

  • Annie1000
  • Annie1000's Avatar Posted by
  • Premium Member
  • Premium Member
More
08 May 12 #329334 by Annie1000
Reply from Annie1000
Hi Thank you
I will request that that happens if court rules against us.CAFCASS are recommending in daughter''s favour, so hopefully it will be ok.

  • Mitchum
  • Mitchum's Avatar
  • Moderator
  • Moderator
More
08 May 12 #329335 by Mitchum
Reply from Mitchum
Hi Annie,
I''m wishing you well for tomorrow. You''ve been so strong all along don''t be afraid now. You and your daughter have suffered greatly at the hands of these grandparents.

Hold your head up and tell the truth. As Had says just show that your daughter''s welfare is your greatest concern. Which is the truth.

Stay strong and focused. You can do this. xx

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11

The modern, convenient and affordable way to divorce.

No-Fault Divorce £179

We provide the UK's lowest cost no-fault divorce service, managed by a well respected firm of solicitors. 


Online Mediation £250

Online mediation is a convenient and inexpensive way to agree on a fair financial settlement.


Consent Order £259

This legally binding agreement defines how assets (e.g. properties and pensions) are to be divided.


Court Support £250

Support for people who have to go to court to get a fair divorce financial settlement without a solicitor.