thank you for the response.
Sad to say the relationship was not that good, particularly with him and my daughter.
We have been to
mediation and for a few months I allowed him to come to the house to see them as they were refusing to go anywhere with him. This caused a lot of problems with my daughter who felt I was ignoring her feelings, she stayed in her bedroom the whole time. My son would tolerate him. Initially when they did spend time with him he would spend most of that time on the phone to his "girlfriends" which caused a lot of problems for my son.
I have put myself in very uncomfortable positions and basically forced them to see him, sadly i think that may have made the situation worse.
My husband was very heavy handed with the children. They both say he is selfish and the only reason he wants to see them is to upset me which I do not believe because I would not be upset. I have made it clear to them that at any time I will contact hi for them. I agreed for them to meet with family friends as a "mediator" and i would stay out of it and agree to whatever plan they decided but the children refused.
they are adamant they do not want ANY contact.