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parental responsibility... advice please

  • Mrs Ingledew
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07 Feb 08 #13153 by Mrs Ingledew
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I think you misunnderstand this. I have asked for mediation. I am in court purely because he does not follow any request at all.

I have been flexible.

For the first 6 months after my ex left I went away every weekend so that he could see the children in the FMH.
I have offered to take the children to and from his house whenever he wanted.

He has now chosen not to see them. I have no way of contacting him as he has changed his email and his phone.

He has chosen to go bankrupt having emptied joint account and business account.

Believe I don't hurt I just want to do the right thing. It is my birthday this weekend we had organised a party and family lunch and he choses now to ask my son to choose...

I am relocating as I have to be nearer work adn would like his opinion on schools - but he can't be contacted. I just wanted to know my rights.

What do I do if either child is hospitalised etc...

  • mummybear38
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07 Feb 08 #13158 by mummybear38
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Its very sad that there is another Dad who doesn't take up his contact agreement when so many Dads would give their right arm for alternate weekends etc. I have a similar arrangement with my ex but he is contantly either late to pick up or can't pick them up because he has to be "somewhere." It used to really upset and annoy me but now I just think his loss is my gain and me and my three children are a closer than ever now. Remain calm, count to ten, speak to a mediator I know mine had a booklet called "Putting your children first" which I think would be ideal for your ex to read - if he could be bothered of course. You may find though that when he gets to know about your plans he will rear his head as fast as lightening and will want to talk to you then! Let us know how you get on with this one.

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07 Feb 08 #13160 by mummybear38
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I know exactly how you feel I too wanted to be fair with my ex about emergencies/sharing of information. My ex has selective wanting to know syndrome and I have to be a mind reader to decide when and why to call him. Have you got a contact number for a member of his family - in dire emergency I would use my son's contact number regardless of the stubborn attitude of the father as sometimes somethings are much more important than petty squabbles.

  • Fiona
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07 Feb 08 #13163 by Fiona
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Sorry, I didn't mean to imply you hadn't been flexible.

There is nothing legally to stop you moving and changing the children's school but if your x2b objects he could apply for a prohibitive steps order or specific issues order. Under the circumstances you describe he's unlikely to get them, but trying to involve him rather than presenting him a done deed might be less hassle in the long run.

  • Mrs Ingledew
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07 Feb 08 #13174 by Mrs Ingledew
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Just wanted to know the legal side. Have tried to involve him - even writen to him . . .

and yes it is his loss. I am just frustrated that he can't see what this is doing to his son by making him choose.

Sadly my son said it would be easier if his dad was dead as I'd have got life insurance and I have to bite my lip as I say "you only have one Dad and he loves you. He just doesn't love Mummy and is a little busy at the moment"

Unfortunately none of his family have his number either!

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