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not sure how this will go??

  • cookla
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22 Aug 07 #2294 by cookla
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Hi everyone
Im posting on behalf of my best friend who left her husband last saturday and has no internet access as is living with her parents.

Can you please give advice.

She has been with him for 5 years married for 4 of them and has a 2 year old son. She finally left after his emtional abuse and controlling nature got too much. There was also one domestic violence incident towards her (never the child)

She has seen a solicitor and is filing for divorce due to unreasonable behaviour and they will sell the house and she is going 60:40 in her favour with the equity.

She has suggested every other weekend and one day a week contact for the child (but not overnight for the week day) He has got very nasty with this and has said he wants 50:50 residency. She does not want this as he has a variety of temp jobs over thepast few years and his working hours and place of work changes so much its difficult for him to guarrantee he can pick the baby up from nursery etc also he isnt secure financially.

As this is now becoming acrimonious and is likely to go to legal could you offer opinions as to the courts view of 50:50 in this particluar case!!!

Thanks xx

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22 Aug 07 #2297 by Fiona
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  • cookla
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22 Aug 07 #2299 by cookla
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Thanks for yur reply.
Knowing my friend there is no way she would agree to even a 30:70 Im not saying i agree with her on this and im not sure what she is scared of. From what i have seen he wasnt a good husband but he was a good dad. She thinks it will be disruptive for the baby or maybe its a fear of loosing control in a way. I know its not financial as she has a permanent job and earns a goo dbit more than him anyway so I dont believe that is a concern for her.
Also her soon 2bx wont get a mortgage due to irregular work and may not even be able to get a place to rent he can afford so in reality will be living with his family (alrady 3 of them in a 2 bed house) and he will be on the sofa-with a large non child friendly dog!!

Im finding it hard to know what to say to her when she asks my opinion. Ive been divorced from my ex for 9 years now and we have a great relationship. My son sees his dad whenever they both want but due to his dad working away in reality he can only see him weekends but he has him half all the holidays and takes him to amazing places-he can afford to do that as I dont ask for any maintenance! No point really as I manage well enough myself. Id rather have less money and get support from my ex than a heap of hassle which money always seems to cause!!!

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