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Shared Residency, ???

  • joanna
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23 Aug 07 #2340 by joanna
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Hello,

Can anybody advise me please?
I am going through a very bitter divorce battle after being married 10 years and have two young children.
My husband wants shared residency as he sees it as his right as they are his kids too. He has 2 businessess that he works full time in and I have always stayed at home with the kids and helped out with some of his paperwork for the businesses.
He wants to see the kids most weekends for approx 36 hours with one, maybe two overnights. I have no real problem with this.
My problem arises with my solicitor who is adamant that I must not let him have shared residency as it will have a bearing on my settlement.
Our 'pot' is quite large and there should be enough to comfortably house both of us adequately. However my solicitor and barrister are telling me that I simply must not give in to him as there will be an implication with the settlement.
I am very confused. I can see that there will be a reduction in child maintenance for the amount of timee that he has them overnight, but appart from that I didn't think there was any difference financially in him having shared residency or just contact. My solicitor indicated it would have an impact on the judge if i gave him shared residency? Please advise/

  • jay160602
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23 Aug 07 #2343 by jay160602
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You havn't said whats best for the children? Is it all about money then? Is he not a good father to your children, you want as much money that he has generated but want to stop him having shared residency for a paltry 1 / 2 nights a week in case it effects the financial settlement.

god what is life coming to, no wonder solicitors get richer.

  • Fiona
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23 Aug 07 #2346 by Fiona
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  • joanna
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23 Aug 07 #2348 by joanna
Reply from joanna
Hi Jay,

Really did not expect the very sarcastic reply to my question, if you re read it I am simply only asking advice as to what my solicitor is saying. I am not saying that he should not have shared residency i am simply stating that he will see the kids for the time that he wants whether it is classed as shared residency or contact.
I am simply asking for advice on why my solicitor is saying that it will have an impact on finances as I cannot see how.
As to what is best for the kids , none of this is. I expect if you look into it the children having to leave the family home as my ex wants to remain there is not ideal, and having to live with me 80% of the time in a house half the size isn't ideal.Having to discover your husband has yet another woman who he has housed and provided a car for isn't ideal.I am simply asking for advice and opinions as Fiona very kindly provided me with not a character assassination.

  • jay160602
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24 Aug 07 #2365 by jay160602
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Hi Joanna, why are you letting your husband keep the house? I'm sure you will find that as the 80% carer for your children you have more of a right to the house than he does.

As regards my sarcastic comments, it appeared to me that your initial questions were all money orientated rather than whats best for your children. For a start fight to keep your children in their house.

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