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Please help/ advise! re: CSA

  • kmt02
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16 Apr 12 #324260 by kmt02
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i am wanting some advise regarding the CSA.

Myself and my partner have been together for 6 and a half years and we have a 4 year old son together, a mortgage, car the usual family bills & expenses.

Around 18 months ago my partner started receiving letters from the CSA regarding his ex-wife from 10 years previous.

We didnot know who they were contacting him about to start with as she has changed her name since leaving him.

They were married after 3 months of being together and it lasted all of 9 months. in the 8th month of marriage his ex wife gave birth to twins, it was not the most joyous of times for them as a couple as the marriage had already started to crumble when he was told by many of his wifes family members that she had never been faithful during their marriage and was messing about even before they married. she denied all the accusations and and swore nothing had happened, therefore he continued the marriage with her on the understanding he couldnot take notice of ''gossip''.
However around a month after the children were born he returned home from work to find the babies gone and house emptied and just his wife there.

She made the statement to him that what her family said was true and she had not been faithful, she married him for his money and that the twins were not his children and had decided she wanted to make her family with the other guy.

She walked out and in a way disappeared! He went to her family to find out where she was as he wanted to know if the children belonged to him or not. the ones who had made the allegations against her did not know where she was and the others had been sworn to secrecy.
he was left with all the debts of the home and bills she had ran up.

we have since found out that she changed her name and moved to dorset (from the east midlands)which we beleive she did to stop him finding her and the children.

he did bump into her in town around 2 years after the split and she felt the need to assault his girlfriend of the time, swiftly followed by her breaking into his house causing criminal damage and stealing cash & jewellery. All of this has been dealt with by the police.

since then there has been nothing untill the CSA letters started to fly thru our letterbox.

Once we got over the hurdle of who she was we came to the issue of birth certificates and the CSA reckoning they have one for the each of the children signed by him - he never signed the birth certificates as she had told him the children were someone elses. It has now come to light 18 month later after hours of phone calls made by us that the certificates are indeed not signed by him and his name his on them thru the presentation of the marriage certificate on the date of the births being registered.

He has questioned parentage from day one and requested DNA tests, it has been made very clear by himself and me (when they contact my phone) that if the children are his there will be no issue and they will be paid for and access would also be looked into, however for 10 years she has been happy to say he is not the childrens father and now all of a sudden she has done this? (we have found out that her and the guy she left with have parted).

The first DNA test was denied and has been marked on file as a refusal by us!- when we requested it! myself and my partner had both lost our jobs and therefore all our saved money went on our mortgage and putting food in our sons mouth and running the car round to job interviews. i explained this situation to the CSA and they informed me that the CSA would fund the test and if it came back the children did belong to my partner the cost would be added to calculated maintenance - but then they logged it as a refusal?.

The second test was agreed by the 3rd case worker (we found out we had got thru 3 in that phone call), he looked at the mistakes made by them and approved a second DNA to be done. We were instructed to await the paperwork and if we had not received this in 10 days to call back.

4 days later we had the legal enforcement team at the door, wanting to question my partner under caution with regards to none payment of child maintenance.I expalined to the worker what had been discussed 4 days previous and showed her the letters we had received and the phone records on my phone to prove we had been in contact. She went away and called back a few days later saying she had been into records and a 2nd DNA had been issued and therefore she had sent the first referal back, whilst she was n the phone to me she received a 2nd referal regarding my partner for not being in contact! as she was on the phone to me and had seen all the evidence that we had been in contact she rejected that referal immediately.

The next thing we knew we had a letter to say my pertner had been put on default maintenance. When he made a call to the CSA to ask what the hell was going on they told him the case worker has now ben changed and therefore anything the previous one had agreed was void - how would he like to pay?

After a very heated 90 minute argument with the most horrid little pillock on the end of the phone we gave up, it was just running our phone bills up on the 0845 number.

I contacted the enforcement worker who had been able to reject the case as she had found the 2nd DNA on record and she assured us that the DNA was going ahead.

We then received a letter regarding a Section 20 where we have to pay to take his ex wife to court to get a DNA test done.
We again got on the phone to find out the case worker has been changed again. She had the same filthy attitude on the phone until i asked her to read her notes. Once she had and called us back she apologised and said she can understand our frustration with this case but a section 20 is the only way forwards.

We have explained that we need to find the funds to make the application to court and then we will get the wheels in motion.

Not a week has passed and we have received a phone call wanting bank and wage details and warning of a DOE request going to my partners work. when asked what for she replied, you owe back dated maintenance. The argument ensued on how he can owe maintenance when we dont know if the children are his yet, it then came about that she had no record of our 4 year old son (who we have explained about several times)and that would change the calculation again!

Since his ex has found out my partner is persuing the paternity issue to court we have received noting but threats and abuse, vile things being said about my own and our sons wished for deaths (what happened between her and my partner happened 4 years before i came on the scene) when you tell the CSA they are throwing fuel on her fire they just say that what she says and does is nothing to do with them

We have had to have the police involved the weekend just passed as she has approached a family member of my partenr and informed them she is back living in our area again and continued harrasing us.

Is there anything we can do regarding the CSA and the mistakes they have made, and can they actually charge back dated child maintenance when its unknown if he is the father yet?

She has also sent messages regarding my partner signing over all parental responsibilty to her and allowing her to change their names from his. we have never responded to any abuse or massages but when we have discussed this with others they have stated there is currently nothing signed by my partner stating he has responsibility and therefore if he signed any such document it would be admitting liability?

Please does anyone have any advise? myself and my partner are absolutely worn out with this and its begining to affect our homelife.

Many thanks in advance.

  • sexysadie
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16 Apr 12 #324271 by sexysadie
Reply from sexysadie
Please remove all the names of professionals from this post. We do not name professionals on Wikivorce and the organisation could get into a lot of trouble if they stay there.

Best wishes,

  • WhiteRose
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16 Apr 12 #324273 by WhiteRose
Reply from WhiteRose
sexysadie wrote:

Please remove all the names of professionals from this post. We do not name professionals on Wikivorce and the organisation could get into a lot of trouble if they stay there.

Best wishes,

Thanks Sadie - have removed names - think I got them all!

kmt02 - Please don''t write any names in your posts - thanks!


  • kmt02
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16 Apr 12 #324280 by kmt02
Reply from kmt02
i apologies for my naming mistake.

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