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Ex wants cost breakdown of his child maintenance

  • finallyhere
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03 Jun 12 #334847 by finallyhere
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Thought you might like to read the reply I received from ex when I told him that to ask for me to provide a breakdown of what Im spending the child maintenance money on was unreasonable and unacceptable........

"If you are going to write to me base your comments on fact and not what the CSA may tell you. If the CSA were as confident re a case against me for arrears and so called "fraud" then I doubt you would have thought to start talking about an agreement? You mention the CSA don''t ask for the info in (4)? Of course they don''t because they are an out dated agency who can''t think further than chasing fathers for payments which they have a history of getting wrong!! They can''t even cite the correct rules within their own Act''s. Item (4) is simple and that is you are obtaining money from me claiming it as maintenance for the children, it cannot be difficult to keep receipts for items as I have suggested, tally them up and provide me with evidence that you are actually doing what you say you are? The CSA like your solicitors don''t care about the kids all they are interested in is ticking boxes to justify their existance. Any report re divorced couples will tell you DON''T involve SOLICITORS or the CSA if you can but resolve issues between you. As usual you take the most costly and disruptive route. If you don''t like item (4) then we don''t have an agreement and I will be writing to my local MP and to the relevant government office, showing how their plans to give fathers more rights are being hindered by beaurocratic baffoons. Is it any wonder I am one of those arranging a March in London against this trash agency. As you can tell this really
me off!! You either want child maintenace or you don''t, the CSA if they are going to bring an action should do so, do you think I really give a ---- about them? I do though my kids so you explain later in life your actions to the girls. Item 4 stays but don''t expect me to take your word as being truthful, ask yourself if you would given past history!! You are seeing a father who has his kids does he seek to sponge off his estranged wife? He actually sounds quite a reasonable person so maybe you should ask him his opinion with out putting spin on it."

Is there any point even trying to deal with a man like this????? What a complete k**b!!
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  • WhiteRose
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03 Jun 12 #334848 by WhiteRose
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:ohmy:

He''s completely contradicting himself! How can you have an agreement between yourself and avoid the CSA if he isn''t actually paying any CM?? Don''t make sense!

It made me laugh when he put you should keep receipts of the things you spend on the kids, tally it up at the end of the month and send it to him ................. :angry:
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  • stepper
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03 Jun 12 #334849 by stepper
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You have no obligation to explain how you spend child maintenance money. If you spend it on your children fine, but it is yours to spend exactly how you like.
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  • sillywoman
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03 Jun 12 #334850 by sillywoman
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Goodness me - aren''t you glad you are no longer with him!
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  • finallyhere
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03 Jun 12 #334851 by finallyhere
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well it would be stepper if I ever received any!!

And yes.. SW... if I ever needed reminding (which I don''t) then he comes up with goods every time :P
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  • Fiona
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03 Jun 12 #334852 by Fiona
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finallyhere wrote:


Another question if I may then.... how much legal water does a private agreement hold? He''s asked that we both have witnesses that will countersign the agreement and he''s put in thesestatements:

"The agreement supersedes and takes precedence over all current and future Child Maintenance Legislation and/or Acts of Parliament that apply to the Law of England and Wales. All Legislation and/or Acts of Parliament are voided unless item (3) applies.

and also "Both parties to this agreement hereby confirm, agree and duly understand the effect of the contents of this Private Maintenance Agreement and both parties to this agreement are of sound mind :-"

Does this obligate me in anyway legally???


An agreement can''t take precedence over legislation

"Where any agreement contains a provision which purports to restrict the right of any person to apply for a maintenance assessment, that provision shall be void." - s9(4) Child Support Act 1991

You can make a private agreement that may be enforced through the small courts but it needs to worded properly to have the best chance of success. See the Resolution sample form available here;

www.resolution.org.uk/editorial.asp?page_id=335
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03 Jun 12 #334855 by Fiona
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PS If you are prepared to write off the arrears you need to see some compromise from your ex. There is nothing wrong with providing a list of expenditure (including capital expenses such computers) to facilitate negotiation and compromise but there is no point to the exercise if the other party is unreasonable and not prepared to agree something that works for both parties. If he won''t sign a binding agreement without conditions about expenses I think you are more likely to receive money through the CSA and I would hold fast. He may reconsider if/when the CSA prosecute.
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