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Is it ok to just move with daughter??

  • moonstar04
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05 Nov 07 #5923 by moonstar04
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ok am in middle of divorce was going for house in settlement but would probably have to sell when it comes to it however I have now been made an offer I cant refuse from a member of my family out of my local area but in my families local area.

If I decide to buy the house at a vastly reduced price is there anthing to stop me taking my daughter. She is 4 and I am the person with day to day care. My ex 2 b would not be happy with me moving 2 hours down the road for sure but so long as it is not illegal to do so I shall do it and take a financial settlement instead of having to sell FMH and buy 2 smaller ones.

thanks in advance

  • Tinny
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05 Nov 07 #5925 by Tinny
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Hi
Complicated for loads of reasons.

Obviously I dont know the whole background but from what you have written I have a few thoughts.

Firstly, do you think it is fair to just move your daughter 2 hours away. She has a right to see her father too. If he did the same to you how would you feel? I think it is important for you to facilitate good contact with her father for her sake.

Secondly, would your purchase of another house just complicate things further? If you own a house that surely would be added to the total marital assets so he could claim a percentage of that too.

What is the best thing for your daughter now? I realise this is a difficult time for you all but try to make it as easy for her as possible.

Tinny

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05 Nov 07 #5926 by moonstar04
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I would rent first until settlement come through then buy after.

I too have thought about the impact but last year when we first seperated it was a nightmare being closer. Ex would just keep turning up to take daughter up unannounced she would then get upset because she did not know if she was coming or going etc. I feel by moving just a little distance in milage will give us all a stability of routine contact for daughter and father, before he was seeing her more than me even though I had day to day care.

I am trying to strike a happy medium by having distance but still allowing access for us both

  • Fiona
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06 Nov 07 #5945 by Fiona
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Relocation is an emotive issue. It's not illegal to move within the UK although your x2b might apply to court for a Prohibitive Steps order to prevent it if he felt relocation wasn't in your daughter's best interests. Courts aren't in the habit of stopping people from moving and rebuilding their lives, but you would need to demonstrate that plans for accommodation, work and education for your child are well thought out. Also there needs to be clear plans for an alternative contact regime that takes into account the longer journey and who is going to be responsible for that journey. (BTW child support might be decreased when there are extra traveling costs.)

JMO, but unless I've missed something there doesn't seem much point in disrupting your daughter more than necessary by moving into temporary accommodation???

  • loobyloo
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06 Nov 07 #5954 by loobyloo
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heres my experience.
I started divorce in feb x2b despite 3 letters from sol asking him to move out he refused. I found it impossible to stay and i moved 120 miles away with 2 children 8 and 10, as was only option at time. I got kids in school and they v settled. At interim maintainance hearing in july the matter was raised and judge made little or no reference as long as kids had own room aqnd in school. their father has seen them twice since we moved he neither phones emails or contacts them, despite me trying to contact him. we are due for fdr in dec and hopefully closure.
so it can be done its not illegal its whats best or you and kids as youre to be sure the one left with the responsibility of their welfare
looby

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06 Nov 07 #5959 by moonstar04
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Hi Looby

thanks for that I too have a similar situation ex2b refuses to move. We have been told that the mh will have to be sold if we cant agree who will stay which we cant. To be honest I need to be near my family and have a 3 bed house waiting, have contacted daughters new school to be and have wheels in motion for the new year and a new start for us all. I cannot just stay here and wait for it all to happen anymore it is detrimental for us all.

thanx again

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