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mediation and looking forward

  • WhiteRose
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26 Mar 12 #320192 by WhiteRose
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Chats - great advice from Mitchum & Miss Tish!

My daughter is younger, but my Nephew is 6 and TBH can''t remember everything. We went to the Zoo with my nephew and on the way back home he had forgotten some of the things we''d done, but when prompted he recalled them. I think its crucial you do as suggested by Mitchum. ;)

Good luck with it all and stay calm & positive :)

WR x

  • Emma8485
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26 Mar 12 #320199 by Emma8485
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Chats I really feel for you.....

It''s clear you love your son so much. I will add my ten pence worth and will hope it helps!

Its a really good idea to do a scrapbook - I am sure he will love doing that with you. Its a record of things you''ve done together and a lovely memory for him as they do forget things at that age.

On the other hand I will also say, doing normal everyday mundane things is fine too. My partner watches DVD''s with my littlest quite frequently - it isnt a bad thing to do... If its a DVD talking about charity trying to save whales it would be educational, if it is Jonny Test or Ben 10 then its purely for enjoyment!

I guess what I am trying to say is that you dont need to be filling all of your contact time with lots of "events" - its so lovely that you can do trips etc with him, and I am sure he loves them and whatever your ex says he doesnt find them boring, but its also perfectly ok for you to sit and chill with him, have a snuggle on the sofa with a teddy and a dvd, these are all things that the kids enjoy in my opinion. Its normal parenting.

And as for whats being said by your ex, why would she email a mediator with such stuff? He is so little that I doubt he goes home and says "mum I was really bored"! Because she has a history of blocking contact etc there would be concern in my mind as to whether he is being prompted.

I would never ever do it, but I have no doubt I could convince my 6 year old that her last visit to her dads was boring because little uns are impressionable, and easily swayed.....

Just my thoughts, my heart really does go out to you.


  • chatsworth08
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27 Mar 12 #320209 by chatsworth08
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thanks guys, i have recorded everything in my diary since 2007. im an honest person and my time with my son is never boring. hes a clever boy but i ask him what hes done at school when i see him and he only remembers a few things.
hes always on the go and the ex knows this. i know i have done right by my son. for some reason i dont think he said he was bored or didnt do anything with me because thats what she wants to hear. hes getting older and im sure things will change.
i cant do any better than i have been doing for the last 5 years. the ex has just got it in for me. i tell her everything but she listens to him, that says everything.

im a good devoted dad and if mediation dont see that then i think im not prepared to go to court again as my solicitor said there could be a chance i might go back to 1 hour a week at a contact centre, all depending on what the ex says. i cant prove anything.
i have tried my best like any father and dad would do.
i will be here for my son no mater what.
the ex is controlling and manipulative, i just have to work my way through it.

i will get there.


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