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Differing opinions on holidays in term time

  • Jenna29
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28 Mar 12 #320546 by Jenna29
Topic started by Jenna29
My ex husband expects that I will allow our daughter to miss a week of school each year so that he is able to take her on holiday for less expense. I have said that I will not agree to this - I think our daughters schooling is very important, plus he can take his holidays from work at any time and has plenty of money. However, he says I am a hypocrite because of my situation regarding holidays. My partner is a firefighter and so his annual leave often does not fall in school holidays. The headmaster of the school our daughter will hopefully go to is willing to grant us holiday time in school time if it is the only time we can have a family holiday. This would only be once every two-three years at most and only if it was the only option. Am I being unreasonable in doing this, but saying I don''t agree to him taking her out of school for a week each year?

  • DrDaddy
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28 Mar 12 #320559 by DrDaddy
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I''d say it is ok to miss a week when you are in primary school, but another matter if you are studying for GCSEs.

Most schools seem to have an unoffical "2 weeks per year" policy. So you could discuss it with your school - if all is well with your daughter''s education, and the school are happy enough, then why should you be unhappy? It may mean that she gets a better holiday with her father. If the school are reluctant, then you have good reason to object.

  • Fiona
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29 Mar 12 #320563 by Fiona
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Many parents think primary education isn''t as important as secondary education. I would argue primary school is more important and shouldn''t be missed (unless children are ill) because young children learn very quickly, they are building the foundations for later learning and it is much easier for them to fall behind.

  • Bobbinalong
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29 Mar 12 #320569 by Bobbinalong
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Everyone will have different views on this and whether they should or shouldnt miss school.
I think the main issue generally in these situations is tit for tat.
My ex took my kids out of school last year to go to spain.
I had no say in this.
When I presented my dates for this year, I quoted a week in august and mistakenly on my part put forward a week in july when they hadnt yet broken up, my ex agreed tot he week in august but just said they hadnt finished school for the other. ie. I wasnt having it.
She has not yet given me the dates for her holiday in june over the whit hols it will no doubt include some time out of school, which I consider, this year I might object too.
Because, what is one can do, can the other? usually no.

  • hawaythelads
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29 Mar 12 #320571 by hawaythelads
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You are being hypocritical.
whatever your justification is.
The fact remains you are saying she cannot miss school for holidays.......unless it''s with me.

To not be hypocritical it would have to be the same rules for both parties.

I wouldn''t think it would bother you one iota that you''ve pxssed the ex hubbie off surely that''s the whole raison d''etre of an ex isn''t it? What other use do they have?:blink:
All the best
HRH xx

  • Deedum
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29 Mar 12 #320574 by Deedum
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I too think you are being hipocritical. Either you can both take her out of school or neither can - for whatever reason.

The worst thing for kids is warring parents.

  • Nota
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29 Mar 12 #320575 by Nota
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Do as I say, not as I do!

Yes you are being hypocritical.

Whatever you think, you will have to try and compromise.

It''s not about your partner, it''s about your daughter.

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