The two who hate me can hate me from affar. They are teenagers and they would hate to be forced to come and hang with Dad when tehy can be out with friends or playing video games. Its the youngest I am most concerned with and this is who i am going to court to fight over. And it will be a fight. My STBX and her cronies are out to prove my girlfriend is bad for their welfare. She doesnt do drugs, she has never been to jail, never been convicted of anything, and the worst they have of her is a half clad holiday pic in Ibiza on the beach - which they said they are happy to produce in court. I just want a relationship with my kids, but it only seems to work when I suck ***** with my STBX- which I just cant do anymore.
I think it is a combination of things, jealousy, resentment, competitiveness, insecurity etc.
Despite my fiance''s ex having met someone before he even started dating me, I still wasn''t allowed to be introduced to his daughters.
Almost 5 months into our relationship and I finally met them, and she wasn''t even informed about it until the girls went home and said they met daddy''s ''friend''.
My fiances ex is a strange one as one minute she''d do things to ''include'' me in the girls lives then when she''d rolled out of bed the wrong side there would be an issue with me.
She even insisted meeting me before overnight stays commenced so we went for a coffee one day. The meeting went suprisingly well and she even asked if she could contact me at times so I willingly gave my number thinking I was helping build the bridge between mother and father. It only lasted a few months before I was tired of the mind games and I changed my number.
We are engaged now and due to get married next year. The ex knows and even told my fiance that she would make the girls available anytime we wanted to include the girls in wedding plans!! This ''positive'' attitude will no doubt change when the wedding date gets closer and the jealousy pangs start again.
I guess what I''m trying to say is if you are certain that your partner is in it for the long term go forth with arranging activities that include your partner and children together over a gradual period. The longer you put it off the more you are fuelling an already blazing fire. In the meantime, appeal to the ex''s better nature (if she has one) and attempt to reassure her that she has nothing to worry about bla bla. What annoys me in these situations is that mum gets to choose who comes over to her house. She could have a whole football team around there on a daily basis and you don''t get to dictate what she does on her own time. In your case your own partner who you are living with moves out for the weekend!!
A lot of problems come in when there are extra people invlved on both sides. In an ideal world both parents wuld be able to sit and talk things through. If nothing else they should at least be able to be polite when they HAD to see eachther.
TBH I view exs new partner as another child even though she is older than me her head is full of the exs lies. I feel sorry for her for a lot of reasons mainly because she has a child and has no idea the kind f man she involved with. She sends abusive messages to myself and my ldest child. Still she helps the boys case for avoiding contact.