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C100 and ex wife''s drinking

  • Fiona
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12 Apr 12 #323330 by Fiona
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What sort of relationship do you have with the school? Have the teachers raised any concerns?

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12 Apr 12 #323333 by MissTish1
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Constantly, throughout all our years of reporting concerns, my husband''s mantra was ''I just want my daughter to be cared for properly'', and that was it. We didn''t know the extent of the difficulties she had until she lived with us, and even now, 9 months later she will come out with things that she''s remembered that are, frankly, appalling. But, for some reason, SS don''t seem to take allegations from an ex quite as seriously. They admitted that to my husband once, said that because he was her ex it was likely he was just trying to cause trouble. Honestly, talk about banging your head against a brick wall!

You cannot ignore this, but how you deal with it is important. Yes, SS involvement will annoy your ex, but that I''m afraid is par for the course. She is more than likely to tell SS she''s teetotal, and the children are more than likely to report no problems, particularly if she doesn''t even drink in front of them, but that doesn''t mean you shouldn''t keep your eyes and ears very much open. You must contact their school, get a copy of their attendance records if possible, talk to their teachers.

Our biggest regret is not pushing things even further (although we did formally complain to the Chief of SS in our area, not that it got us anywhere then), because if we had we could have saved my beautiful stepdaughter from the mental issues she has today.

  • osb
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12 Apr 12 #323335 by osb
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I could contact the school, but the ex is on the PTA, so I''d question how clear they would be with me. I do know that when I asked to be invited to the parents'' evening, the date passed me by without being contacted.

I''ll call them next week - hopefully I''ll be able to get some comfort from them.

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12 Apr 12 #323339 by MissTish1
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osb wrote:

I could contact the school, but the ex is on the PTA, so I''d question how clear they would be with me. I do know that when I asked to be invited to the parents'' evening, the date passed me by without being contacted.

I''ll call them next week - hopefully I''ll be able to get some comfort from them.


Thing is, attendance records speak for themselves, and as you have PR you are entitled to that information. If your ex doesn''t like it, tough, something to mention in Court! Judge wouldn''t be too impressed if she showed disdain at you accessing information about your children!

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