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Negotiating holidays?

  • Emma8485
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01 May 12 #327638 by Emma8485
Reply from Emma8485
Thats been really helpful thank you

She has shown no signs of responding as yet so will see if she does by tomorrow or not! However this isnt additional contact although there is a line in there about that as well. This is to sort out the holidyas in terms of which 50% they are having each - hence why he thought that her not communicating and agreeing these could potentially be seen as a breach of the Contact Order?

We did think that she would respond and wouldnt mess about because part of the Cafcass report said that by refusing to deal with the issues of contact etc she had casued her daughter significant emotional harm and her continung refusal to protect her daughter from the conflict had caused the same effect. The report already says that if she does not change this pattern of behaviour (amongst other things as well) then Cafcass recommend a change of residence to dad. I guess this is why we are surprised that she hasnt answered him.... One of the Bank holidays in question is this weekend!

He is a Litigant in Person - he does have a solicitor for advice when he needs it so could ask them to write to her i guess. :(

  • C. J.
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01 May 12 #327640 by C. J.
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Hi Emma,

I do think that despite reports and recommendations etc parents who behave like this still think that they won''t be ''punished'' for their actions. It''s almost like they are calling the courts bluff on it.

Personally I would advise that you don''t bother getting your solicitor to write an additional letter. It not only costs you money but realisically you don''t want to go through solicitors until the children turn 16. The ex needs to be forced into communicating with your partner - lets face it neither party likes it but it has to be done. You and your partner have done a great job so far plus it shows that your partner is trying to communicate with her directly and exhaust all options with her whether it be via text, letters or calls etc.

The judge that currently oversees my fiances case said he noticed through previous documents i.e. position statements & chronologies that lots of letter writing had gone on over the previous years. In my fiances defence he had to say that not only did he need letters as proof but he felt that letter writing eased the regular complaints of the ex saying he had an aggressive manner everytime he looked at her the wrong way. It was also recommended by the FNF support group too.

Its easy for judges to say "why can''t you two communicate" but its difficult when you have one person who either only communicates when it suits them or has no interest in allowing the children an easy life with both parents.

So frustrating! :angry:

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