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When''s a child old enough to go abroad with father

  • cheshire09
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03 May 12 #328213 by cheshire09
Topic started by cheshire09

I want to take my child on holiday abroad and I have a court hearing to try to sort this next week.

My ex says my daughter is too young. My daughter is 6 and I have been asking for 4 years now!

What age do you think a child is old enough to go on holiday with their father?

Thanks in advance

  • happyagain
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03 May 12 #328219 by happyagain
Reply from happyagain
You are her dad. No age is ''old enough'', children can be taken abroad from the moment they are born. My youngest first went at 6 weeks. I suspect what mum is trying to imply here is either that you are not capable of looking after your daughter for a week, or that the child could not cope being away from her for a week. Both are nonsense.
This is the argument against you, it is up to you to argue your daughter''s right to a normal family life with you as well as mum, to be able to enjoy holidays with you, and to be treated as an equal parent.
My daughter has been spending a week away from me at least 3 times a year since she was 3; one of these is an annual trip to France with nanna. My husbands children spend 5 weeks a year with us in holidays and have done since the youngest was 4, this was via a court order as their mum resisted for the same reasons as yours.

  • Fiona
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03 May 12 #328220 by Fiona
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At the end of the day it doesn''t matter what people think, the only decision that will be binding is that of a judge at a final hearing. Like parents, judges have different attitudes.

What sort of contact schedule is there and has your D been on holiday with you in the UK before, if so for how long?

  • madaboutcars
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03 May 12 #328237 by madaboutcars
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I had the same problem when my I wanted to take my daughter abroad, she was 3 at the time and it went to court. The ex wife was refusing to let me go but the Judge agreed to it on the basis that I brought a international calling card for the ex and rang the ex wife every other day from my mobile at a set time (the calling card was for the ex to ring when she wanted to speak to daughter - only happened twice though).

Maybe offer these things as a way of softening the week away from each other.

Are you going away with a partner/wife?

One of the excuse, the ex wife (and there were a few) was that my partner hadnt been with me for very long (18mths).

Good luck - but I would definetly try to show the Judge that you are happy and willing to keep communication open (maybe offer to ring every evening at 6pm)

Hope it goes well - let us know mate

  • strongerthanithought
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03 May 12 #328247 by strongerthanithought
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I am the PWC and I took my ex (with PR etc) to court as he wouldn''t give permission for me to go on a family holiday to Majorca last year.
He conceded the day before the court hearing but I wanted it signed and sealed (I''d paid for the Judges time after all!), the Judge practically laughed at the situation, couldn''t understand why my ex was being so ridiculous (I''m not a flight risk etc etc etc) and gave me not only permission but a residence order.
As long as you''re responsible, make promises to keep in touch and already have regular overnight care then I would hope you have the same outcome as I did!
Oh, and as I hadn''t counted my chickens, I went home that afternoon to book the tickets and they were £300 cheaper which paid for my court fees!!
Good luck

  • mumtoboys
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03 May 12 #328248 by mumtoboys
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what is the longest time the child has been with you overnight and how long are you proposing to take her away for?

If the longest she''s been away from mum is a couple of nights, and you''re now proposing 14 nights away, it''s possible that your daughter will find it difficult - probably depends on her personality and whether or not she will have other children with her to keep her occupied and whether mum will phone her every 10 minutes to remind her she exists!

Can you clarify for us? Does anyone have experience of a judge ordering a child this young to go from 2 to 14 nights for holiday purposes?

  • jonathancj
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03 May 12 #328252 by jonathancj
Reply from jonathancj
Yes, in my experience judges generally wouldn''t have a major problem with approving this holiday if overnight contact has been taking place regularly up till now. Just occasionally a week''s holiday at first might be preferable but that''s not a precondition really.

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