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What court expects from Parents.

  • Shi Tong
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09 May 12 #329402 by Shi Tong
Topic started by Shi Tong
Hello!

Unfortunately our case has now landed in court over contact and residence.

For those of you who do not know the full history of my case, here''s a very quick lowdown.

Originally there was an agreement to share care. The original agreement was actually quite "unfair" on me with my ex constantly changing plans last minute and feeling free to do what she wanted at show up times. Because of this mediation completely failed because I felt really bullied. Abuse has continued through the relationship and now after separation.

Mental and psychological abuse was severe on me (and later the children), I felt that the children were becoming quite tense and scared around my ex which culminated in a physical abuse incident which put the children at risk and allowed them to see me being abused.

I took advice from a solicitor who agreed that what she had done was assault, but a non mol might be taking the action too far, so instead of this I decided I must apply to court, since communications have become so difficult.

She applied to court first for residence and contact. I cross applied for residence, contact and prohibited steps.

I''ve read "what court expects from parents" in the thread above and am really torn.

Basically, I''ve always been primary carer, but my ex disagrees. I''ve certainly been primary carer since she left, nearly 2 years now.

She''s trying to bully me through school and with medical appointments, a ball which I had to catch when thrown to me when she left, since not once did she mention anything in regards to these, and I was always happy to do them. Going to TALK to her about these things was always impossible because she would either make excuses as to why she didn''t want to, or find a reason to be horrible to me or the kids.

I''ve been trying really hard to maintain contact for the kids, as I feel it''s important, but I had to stop the problems of swap over times since the children were becoming increasingly upset on those days.

My eldest is still young, but clearly tells me what his plans are and sticks to his own routine, which is actually very similar to what we originally agreed. I don''t like it to change and neither does he, but I''m scared court will see otherwise and change plans under our feet.

Not only that but my ex is neglectful of the kids.

I''m scared that should I point these things out I will be ignored and laughed at and the court will not take into account a 7 year old''s views anyway.

I''m also waiting on CAFCASS.

What would a court expect me to do if I feel this neglect and abuse is really pretty severe?

Thanks.

  • jonathancj
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22 May 12 #332241 by jonathancj
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Discussed by pm. Just posting to clear it from unanswered;)

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