A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

Son is refusing contact

  • BIGFOOT600
  • BIGFOOT600's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
26 May 12 #333204 by BIGFOOT600
Topic started by BIGFOOT600
After my last court hearing back in Febuary it was ordered that I was to see my son out of a contact centre but still with supervision. He has just turned 6 and what I had planned for him was entertainment such as Bowling and cinema visits and arcades. My 1st session was cancelled due to my son saying to the supervisor he did not want to go. 2nd contact was cancelled due the the centre have a emergency arise. 3rd contact session due today I am standing outside the venue 20 minutes prior to my sons arrival to receive a phone call to say that my son had got into the car but he then said I do not want to go repeating. My next court hearing is early June so not long to go. But what is it I do now? I feel I have 2 choices either give up or fight for full custody. My son has been brainwashed in not to want anything to do with me and sees his mothers partner has his dad. I know you will all say do not give up but after travelling 300 miles each time to be put through the pain of my disabilities to show willing that I want a relationship with my son. Before now so much could of been done by enforcing contact a long time ago but it seems as if my solicitors do not want to pursue my requests. It''s like a game. My ex and I was asked to write a report out as to why I should/shouldnt see my son out of supervision and she brings into account the domestic voilence that I caused upon her. I have paid my due for that but it has no relevance on how my realtionship is with my son. He did not witness it. This will all come out in the hearing but what I want to say to my counsel is that I have had enough of this treatment from my ex and I want my son in my custody. Any guidance will be much appreciated as always..

Thank you in advance

  • disneybunny
  • disneybunny's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
26 May 12 #333208 by disneybunny
Reply from disneybunny
If you were violent and there is a record of it no court would hand a child over to you. Sorry. You can still fight or contact as is your right and maybe one day you will get a working arangement.

  • Fiona
  • Fiona's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
26 May 12 #333210 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
disneybunny, that isn''t quite correct. DV isn''t necessarily a reason for no contact. See the guidance for courts;

www.familylawweek.co.uk/site.aspx?i=ed31300

When allegations of DV are found to be true the courts will weigh up the risks of harm children suffer from DV against the risks they suffer when they grow up not knowing both natural parents. It''s unlikely that no contact will be ordered when the levels of DV are low. The court considers the effects of DV on the child and the parent with the majority of care, whether or not the perpetrator admits the DV and is prepared to attend anger management or a DV perpetrator programme and change their behaviour. In this case the court has looked at all the facts and decided supervised contact is in the best interests of the child and Mum needs to comply with the court order.

  • Fiona
  • Fiona's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
26 May 12 #333211 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
Bigfoot, are CAFCASS still involved and have you tried contacting them?

  • BIGFOOT600
  • BIGFOOT600's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
26 May 12 #333213 by BIGFOOT600
Reply from BIGFOOT600
Hi Fiona at 1st CAFFCASS did not see the need to get involved. They could see I was a changed man. But it is something that needs to be looked into.

  • Fiona
  • Fiona's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
26 May 12 #333216 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
Well, don''t give up. There are several options the court can adopt. CAFCASS can be asked to investigate or work with the family, befriend your child and bring him to contact or if persuasion doesn''t work the judge can threaten to attach a penal notice, prison or to change residence. Also if your ex still fails to comply with a court order you can apply for enforcement and financial compensation for missed contact but I would wait to see what happens after the next hearing.

  • BIGFOOT600
  • BIGFOOT600's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
27 May 12 #333217 by BIGFOOT600
Reply from BIGFOOT600
I think if anything the form will have to be filled out as to with enforcement and financial compensation. I asked my solicitor to present the ex with this order 2 months ago but has yet has not gone anywhere. I think it''s something for the judge to hear in a couple of weeks. As with regards CAFCASS I also think thats a good idea and shall put this to my counsel

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11