A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

what next

  • delta123
  • delta123's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
More
20 Jun 12 #337863 by delta123
Topic started by delta123
a CAFCASS report has been presented with their recommendations and these include continue with indirect contact such as letters and emails and cards for NRP even though there is no identified risk of the NRP to the children although there has been allegations and counter allegations which some of them are unfounded. my concern as a NRP is that the judge felt l need to make progress in terms of trying to agree with the RP on contact issues in the next four months which is the time cafcass suggested to see if things will improve or change coz there is really no risk the NRP posses just that the RP is using children to fix the nrp what should l do to help her talk with me or to change the situation we are divorcing and l see no problem with that but my ex seems she has not moved on even though she is divorcing me l am thinking she should be happy that me and her will never live together in this life. but its not happening that way what should l do l send emails and letters no reply and its really worrying that in four months no progress wil have been made and l dont know what the judge will do next anyone help me pliz

  • Fiona
  • Fiona's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
20 Jun 12 #337939 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
In circumstances like this communicating through a third party can be really useful. If you haven''t already done so you could make an appointment to see a mediator. The mediator would then write to your wife inviting her to attend an appointment on her own to find out about the process and if she agreed meetings with you both present can be set up. Alternatively you can try negotiating through a solicitor.

  • delta123
  • delta123's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
More
20 Jun 12 #337941 by delta123
Reply from delta123
To be honest she is not interested in any of these discussions at all she is a ***** from hell that I have ever lived with she doesn''t talk to her own family and she wishes I am dead I don''t want to beg her to see my own children she doesn''t care about anyone except herself is there nothing the law can do for pple like me we have four children together 20, 17 15 n 11 she 11 n 15 yr olds she doesn''t want to see the 20 n 17 yr old coz they chose to stay with dad n the siblings r not allowed contact with each other it''s really horrible what happened to my family no contact for siblings on facebk or otherwise she rules the world I am sure there is something that can be done to stop this madness

  • delta123
  • delta123's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
More
20 Jun 12 #337943 by delta123
Reply from delta123
Any help be4 4 mths is up

  • Fiona
  • Fiona's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
20 Jun 12 #337948 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
If you try to organise mediation or negotiation there will be evidence that you are being reasonable. As far as indirect contact is concerned keep trying even if it means using snail mail. Just be very careful not to be tempted to give the children your side of the story. Just let them know that you and their siblings love them and the door is always open. Share stories and copies of photos of happier times you all enjoyed together.

  • delta123
  • delta123's Avatar Posted by
  • Elite Member
  • Elite Member
More
20 Jun 12 #337956 by delta123
Reply from delta123
Thank u Fiona this sounds very surgical n short but coherent advice I can almost see the logic of it which is to continue to show the nice side of things one last thing that u also touched I am self rep she has lawyers what sort of mediation can l arrange n with who I am interested to pursue reasonable communication to fix this should I approach her solicitors on this u also seem to be very knowledgeable on these matters I could email u some of my letters to her n my kids so u can c if they r not offending in anywhere coz my ex is extremely sensitive n anything can erupt into a volcano of emotions thanks for taking time to assist

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11