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Moving Away, Where Do I Stand?

  • justme55
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10 Aug 12 #348538 by justme55
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Hi I''m new here and have a couple of questions.

I have recently told my EX partner that I intend on moving away with my new partner to somewhere that''s around 200 miles away. He currently see''s my daughter on alternate weekend''s no more through choice. I have told him that I''m still willing to allow this to happen and that he can have her whenever he likes all he has to do is ask. Holidays etc (she''s 19 months old BTW) so yet to start school. To date I have never stopped him from seeing her and never would try to. I''ve also told him the that I''d be willing to meet him halfway etc as well to make sure he gets this contact.

I''m due to be moving into our new place on the 20th of August and have made an application with my partner and has been accepted and paid the reference fees etc. And my EX partner has only just told me tonight that he has spoken to solicitors and that he will try to stop me.

Where do I stand with all this? Will he have a very good chance of stopping me? Tbh I really really don''t want to go down the court route and if it''s really likely to get dirty I''d try to possibly just stay. But like i said i will more than be willing to help sustain and keep going the contact he has had since we split up.

He has PR and we split up Christmas last year. I have been with my current partner for 5 months as well. My daughter plays and gets on with my partner very well and she consistently ask''s for him and they do get a long well.

  • DrDaddy
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10 Aug 12 #348541 by DrDaddy
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I don''t know - whatever you say, by moving 200 miles away you *are* stopping him from seeing his daughter. I don''t know if you could really call it "dirty" - wouldn''t you go to court if he tried to move your daughter 200 miles away? I bet you''d do anything to stop him, wouldn''t you? I would.

You''ve only been with your new partner 5 months. Its not really stable yet - hey maybe you''ll spend the rest of your life with him, but statistically the odds are that you won''t - but when he''s gone, your ex will still be your daughter''s father.

  • ffc1991
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10 Aug 12 #348569 by ffc1991
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DrDaddy wrote:

I don''t know - whatever you say, by moving 200 miles away you *are* stopping him from seeing his daughter. I don''t know if you could really call it "dirty" - wouldn''t you go to court if he tried to move your daughter 200 miles away? I bet you''d do anything to stop him, wouldn''t you? I would.

You''ve only been with your new partner 5 months. Its not really stable yet - hey maybe you''ll spend the rest of your life with him, but statistically the odds are that you won''t - but when he''s gone, your ex will still be your daughter''s father.


She has stated in her post though that she''s willing to share travel and still accommodate his contact he already has. When my EX partner moved away I was fine with it as long as she stuck to our agreements which she didn''t. But if she had I would of had no problem with this personally.

After all surely that''s what matters is your contact being stable with your daughter/son? I may see things differently and may be why I''m in the mess that I am now but if she say''s she willing to accommodate contact and always has done then I personally can''t see the problem.

Could even write your partner a letter offering him everything he already has and what your willing to do to help keep the contact going and also forward this to his solicitor if he has gave you his/her details.

By the looks of the post I think dirty means like a nasty court battle am i correct? and tbh I think every parent or most anyways wouldn''t really want that.

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10 Aug 12 #348624 by DrDaddy
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ffc1991 wrote:

She has stated in her post though that she''s willing to share travel and still accommodate his contact he already has. When my EX partner moved away I was fine with it as long as she stuck to our agreements which she didn''t.


I know what the OP stated, but I think you''ve hit the nail on the head yourself.

I am sure that the OP is genuine in her intentions, but the fact is that 200 miles is a big barrier to contact in all sorts of ways. Not much chance of ever getting mid-weeks, for a start. Her daughter will not have such good contact with her father.

Maybe you were happy in your case. The OPs ex is not, and who would blame him?

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