Hi, thanks for your reply.
No grandparents are all absolutely fine with her, in fact she does love going there because it''s the only time she gets to spend time with her cousin from my fiance''s side, as they''re the same age.
We haven''t done the whole blended family thing because, we tried to broach the subject to his son, who''s very happy with my youngest son, who''s 12. My youngest is very protective of his 6yo, so we tested the water and asked him, when it was his sleepover would he like to have a sleepover at my house with my children. We got a very straight "no thank you!"
So with that in mind plus the fact that his daughter doesn''t even want to stay at her Grandma''s with her dad we didn''t want to push it as it''s fraught enough.
There probably is a trust issue, the mother has manipulated and told the children some terrible things and yes it was my fiance who left the marital home
, but that was after a 3 years of living in the spare room as the mother didn''t want to be in a relationship with him anymore, in fact she had asked him to move out and when he suggested Relate, she refused. So after 3 years, move out he did which obviously suited her as she never made contact with him whilst he was separated and living back home with his parents.
Then he met me, several months later and that''s where it all fell apart with the kids, from having very regular access it became bitter and access stopped, hence court and contact orders.
Divorce is hell, I''ve been there. My ex husband walked away from me and our 3 children wihtout a glance back. He left me in nearly £200K of joint debt, our marital home was repossessed, our car was repossessed and he went off with another woman, had 2 children and hasn''t seen his own children since 2004, nor has he paid a single penny for them. I have a court order with nominal amounts of 15p per year per child maintenance
and I can''t take him back to court as he lives abroad. Now that''s a pig of a man!
I find his ex''s behaviour absolutely deplorable and sickening, people who use their kids as pawns should really see the bigger picture and realise that there really are some horrible people out there, I wish she could walk a mile in my shoes as it may just make her realise that her ex husband is actually a very good father and all he wants is the best for his children. They divorced and that''s sad but he didn''t have to divorce his kids.