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What to expect?

  • Emma191
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18 Sep 12 #356610 by Emma191
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This is my first post but I found this site a few weeks ago and have been looking through trying to get as much info as I can mainly because i''v got my first Directions hearing tomorrow and have to admit I am petrified!! Especially because I have to represent myself.:(

I''v had the telephone interview already with CAFCASS but I really don''t know what to expect from here on in? I kind of think the interview went okay, but I''m also aware that it can be anyone''s guess,

I wondered if anyone could tell me what happens in the first directions so I can maybe stop wearing a hole in my carpet?? Just to give you an idea by the way, he''s taking me to court for fortnightly contact, holidays and birthdays etc.. He gets all of this already except for the weekends he insists he can''t have the kids because he''s busy.

  • ozzywiz
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18 Sep 12 #356611 by ozzywiz
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Emma, you will be absolutly fine. .

You are not on trial or in any trouble and no one is judging you as a person or a parent. You are all their to work towards the best interest of your kids.

The judge will make no real rulings tomorrow at the Directions hearing other than what you and their father agree on then it will be a Consent Order. If their is specific issues you both dont agree on their will be a later date set for a contested heraring or a further directions hearing and possibly an investigation from CAFCASS.

As you both are not raising any welfare issues and contact is allready established i dont think it will go much further than a Consent Order for contact and tomorrow might be the end of it. . .

Keep child focussed and dont let your emotions rule you, dont go off on one and answer any questions with a direct answer as time is limited. think about everything.

take a drink and maybe somthing eat with you in case of a long wait. . .

Most of all good luck and let us know how you get on.

  • Emma191
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18 Sep 12 #356615 by Emma191
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Thank you so much ozzywiz, you''ve really put my mind at rest, to know it could be over tomorrow would be great, however the ex, sadly is less than amicable so I am less than confident on that. But I shall definitely keep calm, at least until I get home anyway...

  • tiredandirritated
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18 Sep 12 #356616 by tiredandirritated
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Good luck im sure you will be fine

  • Emma191
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18 Sep 12 #356624 by Emma191
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Thank you, I hope so :)

  • khan72
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19 Sep 12 #356647 by khan72
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If both of you are talking and reasonable. Try mediation. Keep your laundry out of court. If this is not possible, then write down what you want. Basically propose a contact regime. Write it down as you might forget. Negotiate prior to the hearing. Be open to give and take.

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19 Sep 12 #356661 by Emma191
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Thanks khan, we''ve already tried mediation, I''m now quite a bit poorer to prove it. I and the mediator were under the impression it had worked as far as contact goes, but he''s still taking it to court, and communication between us is definately a no go. I''m definately open to give and take though and I''ll take your advice and write everything down before I head off and see how it goes from there.

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