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C79 Application

  • TriedAndTested
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20 Sep 12 #356862 by TriedAndTested
Topic started by TriedAndTested

  • Mark100
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20 Sep 12 #356864 by Mark100
Reply from Mark100

I am unsure what a C79 is. My situation is a little similar to yours and I ahve gone back with another application for Shared residence - C100.

Whatever form you use I think you are right to do it if you can''t agree these things directly with your ex.

Good Luck.

Thanks from Mark

  • u6c00
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20 Sep 12 #356866 by u6c00
Reply from u6c00

I think that you will struggle to enforce a contact order without significant evidence that the order itself is being breached.

Lots of the things that you describe are completely unacceptable, but largely don''t amount to breach of the contact order. I think instead you would need to ask to vary the existing order to take a few things into account. For this you would need a C2.

There are certain things that you can do to reduce the conflict in order to help your children. For example, requesting handovers take place at a public place like outside your nearest contact centre or at a shopping centre etc. That should reduce the conflict with your ex''s bf. Also your ex is going to be really hacked off when she finds out she''s got to go to extra effort in order to facilitate contact and it might force her into line if she knows this is on the cards. This can be written in to your existing order.

You could apply to extend your weekends from Fridays to Mondays, that way you can collect and drop off at school and you don''t have to have any contact with the ex or her new bf for the majority of the time. Again, you would need to vary the existing order to include this if you see it as a feasible option.

Keep a contact book, just an A5 notebook (where pages can''t be torn out ideally). Notes should be passed back and forth through this rather than relying on your child to do it. The court aren''t likely to order this but if you can show that you have tried it as a way of reducing conflict it can only help your case, even if your ex won''t comply.

My final suggestion is not to let your kids see any reaction to messages that they are forced to pass. If your ex is committed to involving the children there''s not much that can be done but the only way to minimise the conflict for the children is for them not to see it from you. Send your messages back to her in the contact book (or in writing on a piece of paper if your ex won''t play ball) and just listen to your ex''s messages without reacting.

It might well be helpful to ask at court for you both to attend a Separated Parents Information Program which might help your ex to understand the effects of her continued behaviour on the children. For you, you might get some more ideas on reducing the conflict.

Hope that helps, I think varying the existing order sounds more realistic than enforcing it when many of the issues you raise won''t come down to enforcement.

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