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are children returned or collected?

  • manta
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03 Oct 12 #359051 by manta
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Hi all
Things are on the up for me and getting better :)
I have a shared residence order with 50/50 contact, this is worked with 4 nights one week and 3 the next. i take them to school 3 mornings a week (having reduced working hours to do this) and they come back to me either sat afternoon or subday morning from their mothers.
Should she return them or do i have to collect them?

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03 Oct 12 #359058 by manta
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Just to clarify, we both have full time jobs and working cars, the distance is about 4 miles
I work 6 days a wek and her 5
My change day is always wednesday and i take them to school (secondry) and they return to her. They then come back to me either sat after my work has finished (5pm) or sunday morning depending on if it is a 3 or 4 night week, they alternate sunday morning was demanded to be 9am so that she could go horse riding. Im thinking that if things got silly and it ended up back in court, apart from a judge complaining that court time was being wasted they would tell us to share the traveling?

  • hawaythelads
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03 Oct 12 #359061 by hawaythelads
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In all honesty she is going to resent bringing the kids anyway no point in sticking in arguments on points of principle when you have a decent working arrangement in shared residence working around your shift pattern.
For the sake of a 4 mile trip I wouldn''t bother.You could end up with her saying shared residency doesn''t work.
Her Horse is definately gonna come far higher up her league tables of priorities than making herself in a rush to drop the kids to the ex hubby.
All the best
HRH xx

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03 Oct 12 #359067 by stepper
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Just do what is best for the children Manta. You are in a fabulous position with 50/50 shared residence so work together to keep it that way. Count your blessings.

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03 Oct 12 #359105 by manta
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Well the horses was one of the things that started this journey ;)
I was offered the children 1 day a week and stuck to my guns, I presented my case to cafcas and to the judge, after the first court hearing went very well the ex came back and accepted my request. originaly we had agreed a change time of mid day sunday, this was altered to 11 and now she wants 9am, me being cynical think this is that every other saturday is my only free night for myself and by being tied to turn up at 9am sunday morning it limits what i can do saturday evening even if that means now only 2 pints down the pub (sunday morning breath tests are a favourite)
It was pointed out that the arangements are fitted arround my working pattern, they are to suit both of us. I have changed my working hours to suit the times I have my children not the otherway round. It is a typical and sad point of view that men should be thankfull for what we have, we deserve to be treated fairly and EQUALY at all times

Thank you all for the coments, here has always been a good place for advice and just using as a sounding board

Cheers
Manta

  • Sjw19850141
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03 Oct 12 #359114 by Sjw19850141
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I''d stick to sharing if you can, why does it have to be 9 am? Surely if its her horse she can ride it when she wants to? I get it we all need "me" time but the kids come before a horse....

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03 Oct 12 #359131 by MrsMathsisfun
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I would agree to collecting the children but maybe at 10am. Halfway between the two times and a compromise?

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