A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Mon/Fri 9am-6pm       Sat/Sun 2pm-6pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

Outcome from today''s hearing!!!

  • sleepybird
  • sleepybird's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
03 Oct 12 #359118 by sleepybird
Topic started by sleepybird
Hello all

Well my partner had his enforcement hearing today and to be honest it didn''t go as well as we''d hoped it would.

The judge asked questions based around my partners position statement and his ex''s response statement. He said that my partner was crazy for asking for more contact due to the circumstances.

He did tell the ex that she needs to be more stern with contact and not let son decide if he''s going or not.

He threw out the suggestion of a contact centre for handovers and insted suggested that my partner take my daughter who''s 5 with him to collect son and that she could make all the difference (WTF)

He has adjourned the case until november and wants to see how it goes until then. He has also said that a meeting with the school should take place and some counselling put in place so he can have a report of what the councillors thought before the next hearing.

He was basically didn''t want to see any emails which prove she wants son to make all decisions or any other suggestions that sons behaviour is due to his mother.

Just so peed off now although we hope she knows that my partner means business and wont stand for her crap anymore!!

Let''s just see what happens Saturday now when my partner goes to collect son with my daughter. If he says he doesn''t want to go then theres no suggestion in place of how to deal with that unless the ex has a change of heart and encourages him a bit more.

Exhausted with it all now!!!

  • disneybunny
  • disneybunny's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
03 Oct 12 #359122 by disneybunny
Reply from disneybunny
TBH courts rarely want to see any tit for tat between the parents. Taking your child into a war zone sounds like madness I would not have agreed as it could be bad for her emotional health. Focus on the positives the ex has seen you will stand your ground, someone is going to asses the child''s needs/wishes. I think it is good for the child to feel they have a voice. It''s not that things went bad for you today it''s just the courts trying to not make a bad situation worse.

  • mbird
  • mbird's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
03 Oct 12 #359136 by mbird
Reply from mbird
Oh poor you, hmm I am quite suprised. However at least she has been told that it''s not for the child to dictate contact, ie she has to be more stern with her child.
Ok so you have another month, hopefully by then if things haven''t changed then the judge will have to come up with something more substantial. Also if the mother is alienating her child against his father this will come out in counselling.
You have to stay positive, sleepybird. Liars always get found out, and eventually she will realise that she can''t control her childs life, and that your partner has equal responsibility for that child. She obviously doesn''t like it, but those are the facts. Some mothers use their children as weapons trying their best to hurt the nrp and claiming it''s in the childs best interest... If only they knew the long term damage.

  • sleepybird
  • sleepybird's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
03 Oct 12 #359141 by sleepybird
Reply from sleepybird
Well it seems we have wasted our time as we just spent an hour in her home with son as it''s his birthday and I mentioned about an event that I have tickets for, she replied what date? So I said the date and that it falls on a contact weekend and her reply was well let''s hope everything is sorted by then and he will want to go (in front of son)

What the judge saud has Just gone in one ear and out the other as in other words if he says no then yet again he wont be going.

My partner said the judge seemed to be angling that it''s something he has done as to why son doesnt want to see his dad so I feel that now it doesn''t matter what happens between now and the next court date as the judge wont do nothing about it anyway.

So low. She also said in her house today that son had weed himself upstairs and that''s very unlike him blah blah blah.

This is never going to work out, especially with that judge!!!

  • sleepybird
  • sleepybird's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
03 Oct 12 #359142 by sleepybird
Reply from sleepybird
Oh anf the judge said everything has to be taken very slowly now and in small steps, which is exactly what she wanted!!!

  • disneybunny
  • disneybunny's Avatar
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
03 Oct 12 #359149 by disneybunny
Reply from disneybunny
This is not about you and your partner or even her it is about a child who is now distressed. Of course it has to go slowly if the situation gets worse with forced contact you may never be able to repair it.

  • sleepybird
  • sleepybird's Avatar Posted by
  • Platinum Member
  • Platinum Member
More
03 Oct 12 #359151 by sleepybird
Reply from sleepybird
I do understand that but she has said today that she will still give son the choice again which is why were in this situation now.

With her it is about her own way and what she wants, as if she cared at all then she would never have started putting her son on the phone aged 2 to tell his daddy that he doesn''t want to see him. She wants my partner to walk away and has brainwashed her son so that will happen!

And sorry if I feel like this but you''ve got a judge sitting there letting her get away with it too.

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11