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Can a hands on father get residence

  • CaringParent
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03 Oct 12 #359210 by CaringParent
Topic started by CaringParent
Can a hands on father who does all morning routines ( breakfast, helping get ready etc ) drops his daughter to school everyday get residence
Picks up from school 4 days a week
Is sole and primary carer 3 days / 4 ays a week
And joint carer rest of the week get residence
Help the child every day with school work
Puts child to bed
Ex works away 3 to 4 days a week at a far away airport
Daughter is 5 years age
However ,
There are several allegations made by ex.
Ex wants to move child to other city
We are settled in the city we are in since Year plus
Cafcass report awaited.
Shared is difficult due to geographical distance

I and my child live in the same house and have lived together all 7 days until interim order
Since 2 years ex works in a different city 3 days to 4 days a week at. Far airport 3 hrs drive
I took PSO as ex seriously threatened / intended to take child away to a different city

By joint carer I meant, ex n me both used to care for our child when she was back every week for 3 of 7 days.

She applied Residence
She has made false DV allegations
She works at an far airport (3 hrs)

Interim order Until, final hearing:
child is with me 4 days
And 3 days with Ex

CAFCASS report awaited
Ex has made many false DV allegations
I have made one true DV allegation backed by medical etc

Please DO reply

  • khan72
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03 Oct 12 #359214 by khan72
Reply from khan72
The DV card....

Before you do anything. Why not just talk with stbx and just agree 50/50. Think of the child(ren). Have both of you gone on a Parenting Information Program? If not, please give it a go before going to court. Try mediation. Try agreeing to take ur allegations back.
If you cant agree... its going to be very expensive.
The short answer is the one with the medical evidence will be stronger. False allegations get made all the time.

  • disneybunny
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03 Oct 12 #359218 by disneybunny
Reply from disneybunny
Agree with khan try the mediation first anything to stop it going bad quickly. Pip are good but rely on communication. You could also try a family nurturing programme to help deal with any fallout the kids may give.

  • Lostboy67
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03 Oct 12 #359221 by Lostboy67
Reply from Lostboy67
Yes it is possible, but dispite what the law says being a man is against you.
You seem have got into a bit of an arms race with your s2bx. Its quite possible that a shared residence order could be made, that does not imply a 50:50 split of time just that your child has two places to call home. I would appear that your ex''s work pattern could make child care difficult for her. Is ther a formula that would allow both of you to have good contact and not disrupt her work pattern.
Ideally you need to put the past DV reports etc behind you and work together to work out a solution that works for everyone, and most importantly your child


  • khan72
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03 Oct 12 #359223 by khan72
Reply from khan72
My advice.... Keep Out Of Court

Try counselling with your stbx. Relate counselling can help with the emotional issues of separation. Unless your situation is high conflict, do not fan the flames.

I know a lot of divorced people who work things out in an amicable way. Its the best way long term. Just avoid mutual game plays.

  • CaringParent
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03 Oct 12 #359228 by CaringParent
Reply from CaringParent
It is in court

  • Fiona
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03 Oct 12 #359231 by Fiona
Reply from Fiona
Courts are used to separated parents'' allegations and counter allegations. Without evidence the court will have difficulty in choosing between two versions of the same story.

If there is a PSO and Mum has applied for residence the courts are already involved. Generally when there is evidence that the established arrangement is both parents worked and shared care 50:50 or almost 50:50, including responsibility for children when they are at school, before separation it''s likely the courts will award shared residence 50:50 after separation. In your case it seems the interim order reflects that.

When residence is shared 50:50 or almost 50:50 and one parent wants to move a distance away it may well be deemed less disruptive to a child''s schooling and friends for them to remain with the parent who isn''t moving.

Above all arrangements need to be practical. If the move is a distance away making 50:50 shared residence impractical your daughter is going to have to live mainly with one parent. If this is this case there is every probability a cross application for residence would be successful.

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