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  • Sandyq3
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09 Sep 18 #503760 by Sandyq3
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hello and thankyou in advance for any advice received.

quick background very long ( 2 years) and difficult divorce 3 years forward and things are still as bad we have 3 children 12,8,5 who go from not seeing their dad to 3 nights , mediation about 18 months ago re children.

My current problem is that dad has kept the middle child stopped me having contact phone or otherwise and has allowed me 2 supervised visits in 3 weeks (supervised by him ) this is absolutely breaking me :(he has ceased contact with the other children.

there is also an issue with his family who havent seen the children in years ( their choice ) my ex has stopped me picking up my middle child from school despite me being there to collect the 5 year old , my ex father in law who i didnt recognise as ive not sen him in years was at school to collect my middle child and was witnessed by several parents filming me and my younger son i have reported this to the police.

I just dont know what to do next ? court

Many thanks

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09 Sep 18 #503761 by .Sylvia
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I'm sorry to hear of your difficult situation.

I'm a little confused, your current problem is that dad isn't facilitating phone and physical contact between you and your child during dad's agreed 3 days? Or have I read that wrong?

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09 Sep 18 #503762 by Sandyq3
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Apologies it’s not clear I’m struggling to think straight ...
My ex used to have contact with the children for 3 nights a week but has refused to bring my middle child home for 3 weeks now he’s restricted my access to him and has effectively ignored the other 2 he’s not had contact with the younger child for 5 weeks now .
Hope this makes sense

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09 Sep 18 #503764 by .Sylvia
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Thank you, yes that makes sense.

Is there a Child Arrangements Order in place?

If not, I would suggest you offer a return to mediation so that you can both discuss the situation and are if you are able to come to an agreement over the arrangements. It seems odd that he has kept one child but has refused to see the other two. They must be very confused.

It might be an idea to contact MATCH Mothers who support mother's apart from their children, they have a free support line.

I think there is a deeper history here, and I can appreciate that you may not wish to share it on an open forum. Feel free to pm me if you ever want to chat.

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09 Sep 18 #503766 by Sandyq3
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Thankyou for your reply unfortunately theres not a residence order in place we had a Consent Order and he takes no notice of that ...
It is complicated yes but to keep one child from me is awful my other 2 are confused social services have no concerns around me either so they’ve just said it’s a civil matter how can someone do this ?
I just need some advice as what to do next ?
Many thanks

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10 Sep 18 #503776 by .Sylvia
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I do think mediation is a good starting point - if it doesn't work then you can move forwards with a court application for a Child Arrangements Order, to cover the arrangements for all three children.

But - you will need to start moving things along sooner rather than later, you don;t want the current situation to become the established status quo.

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