Who should get to dictate the dates of contact?

This is my first post, but after nearly two years since separation and fighting the same battle with my ex, I’m interested to know how other people deal with this and what a court might rule. I am the resident parent and have the children 90% of the time. Since separation I have had to return to full time work and also find the time to do every single school run, and all the ferrying about to clubs, sports, activities etc. My ex has chosen to move nearly two hours away to live near his new partner and claims that his job prevents him from doing any school runs etc - what about my job???? . He seems to think that he has the right to dictate when he will or won’t see his children. He books his own holidays first and then contacts me to arrange time with his kids, and expects me to cancel our own plans to facilitate his timings. As the custodial parent, doing all the parenting and running about, I feel very strongly that if he’s not prepared to help with any of the day to day stuff, why should he expect to dictate dates to me? Does anyone else have this situation?

Unfortunately you can't force him to see his children or take an active parenting role.

If you already have plans tell him that and don't change them all the time just to accommodate him.

You can only encourage and support his involvement in his children's lives. If he doesn't want to it's his loss but no one can be forced.