My fiance''s ex is very selective when it comes to revealing any issues when it comes his daughters illnesses.
He wishes to be added onto their doctors database requesting that he is kept informed of any medical issues that they may have. Do GP''s ever do this?
He has a template letter that he wishes to send off - do these work or would he be wasting his time?
My fiance does not have a copy of his daugther''s birth certificates so would the GP accept a copy of a contact order to prove who he is?
Also my fiance is starting to get concerned as the ex also does a lot of self dianosing. In the past either of his daughters have had autism, dairy allergy, ashma, they ''feel under the weather'' a lot, feel sick, loose bowels, coughs, chest infections the list goes on. There is something always allegedly up with them, which doesn''t appear to surface when they are with us. (Btw - the dairy allergy , ashma and autism was later dropped by the ex and these issues disappeared.)
Calpol is used for everything and is regularly administered to the girls. It appears once the girls for example cough she then uses it to ''prevent'' the break out of a proper cough.
It''s getting to the point now where the girls come to our home and always think there is something wrong with them.
One daughter has now been told by her mum that she has hay fever because her nose runs sometimes and is supplying her with liquid medicene for allergies.
The girls also went to an easter dance at their local school last Thursday and because they woke up with their legs feeling tired from all the jumping and dancing the calpol came out again
My fiance said that''s like him feeling tired from playing in a footy match and then administering himself with paracetamol.
Does anyone have an advice on the issues I''ve raised? Thanks
Hmm, sounds like mum has some issues to be honest. My stepdaughter''s mum was like that, with herself also, and went as far as to tell my stepdaughter she probably had a heart condition, and the latest ones are that SD has a lazy eye (she does not) and asthma (she does not). Needless to say, years of this kind of parenting have led to a very health conscious, bordering on the obsessive, 13 year old girl who has something ''wrong'' with her nearly every day. As I work in the Health profession, I do tend to ignore most of it in the hope that it will lessen. It''s not healthy to put into children''s heads that they are ill, or dose them up with medications for things that don''t need it. In some serious cases, it can be caused by either Munchausen''s Syndrome or Munchausen''s by proxy.
So, your fiance does need to get in touch with their GP, not only to make himself known to the GP but also to make the GP aware of these issues and to see whether any of the ''illnesses'' mum says they have have ever been diagnosed.
Your fiance has PR I assume? He would have that if they were born after December 2003, or if he was married to their mother, or if he had gained it via Court Order. Usually a GP would want to see proof of PR. It might be a good idea to call the Surgery where they are registered (and speak to the Practice Manager) and ask them what proof they need, and go from there. At the Surgery where I work, we put alerts on children''s computer records to say something like ''dad is ...... and is entitled to information regarding the child'' so that if a father rings up he is not stalled in any way. I would imagine most medical computing systems have this kind of facility, so the childrens notes are flagged to say that dad can access their records and receive information about them.
Your fiance, once he has proved he has PR etc., can then ask for full copies of their records to look at himself, although there may be a charge for this.
GP Practices don''t routinely send out copies of information to both parents as schools do though, so it would be a case of your fiance contacting the GP Practice if he wants to know anything.
Funny you should mention the lazy eye thing because the girls have just been given glasses for this same thing, so I''m guessing this is one condition that the girls actually have.
Yes my partner does have PR. He initially tried to get a copy of their records about 18 months ago when the dairy allergy was the latest condition. Their GP wasn''t very helpful and even when they did finally say he could have a copy of the records for £20 they still faffed about it even the doctor said she''d need to contact the medical association to get clarification on this subject. They also contacted the ex to clarify who he was despite them accepting a copy of is then contact order at the time. In the end my fiance didn''t bother paying the £20 and dropped chasing the matter. The ex on the otherhand decided to use this matter at a previous hearing to say that my fiance was being agressive with the doctors!
We have agreed to start keeping a diary on this as there is always something wrong with them.
We paid £35 for my partners daughters records - apparently the BMA guidelines state that if the records are held on a mixture of electronic and paper forms, then they can ask for up to £50! Its less if theyre only held electronically tho.
This may sound a daft question but how will he know if they actually have added him onto the records? Does he ask that they write to him to confirm once they have done it?
I don''t think that''s unreasonable, but one way to find out would be to test it out by ringing & asking for info from a receptionist. If the info is freely given (after asking his name) then he will know he''s been added.