My ex husband has our girls every Wednesday evening and has done since we seperated. Some friends are taking their kids out on Thursday to a theme park and have invited our eldest. He has told her that she can go. Because her school has a zero tolerance on absence, I sent him a text to say he has to give her a note for school to say why she is absent - he sent me one back saying she is never off sick so that will be the excuse for the day.
I said I dont agree but not much I can do. It then transpires that he actually wants me to call her in sick. I rang him to say that I wouldnt, and he tells me believe it or not, that I am their primary carer, and its my responsibility to deal with school, doctors etc not his. I have to confess I was angry and I said that I wont call her in sick, I cant afford the fine! I also said that when she doesnt turn up for registration they will call me, and I will pass on his number at which point he said "Do what you like I wont answer the phone to them"
I have no idea what to do next? He has been a little erratic lately, we had the issue with the camera and now this?
The girls spent some time with him this weekend and the eldest came home full of his nonsense about he pays his CSA so therefore I am totalyl responsible for them, and there is no way he is getting involved with schools and things.
Then this morning I got a text asking when parents evening is and why havent i invited him.
What do you do when a parent wont accept that they have responsibility for their own children????
I would speak to the school and then formally write to them so there is a record of what has been said and copy your ex. If the problem arise again a solicitor''s letter on your behalf might resolve the problem. Ultimately you could apply to court for a Prohibited Steps Order to prevent your ex from removing the children from school.
Thanks Fiona, I am worried he will go through with this threat of not informing them and then the school will ring me on Thursday and I wont know what to say?
Absolutely, speak to the school before Thursday and let them know what''s happened. He has PR and has to take some responsibility for this. He can''t just agree to have her out of school for the day and then not accept responsibility for dealing with the school.
I think if schools are going to have a zero tolerance on absence then they need to have a zero tolerance to strikes, 2mm of snow on the road, training days in school time,smoke in the atmosphere (Buncefield explosion), the heating doesn''t work, building work etc etc etc.