As regards the practical movements of the children, you cannot win against your ex wife. For clarity there is no action you can take that will have a positive outcome for you.
However, this kids stuff is not really about the kids. It is about your ex wife trying to punish you and your feelings of injustice that she can get away with it.
For you to move on you need to get rid of these feelings of injustice.
What, therefore is your best course of action?
1. Do not bother fighting her on anything regarding the children.
2. Drive a very hard bargain regarding finances. Do not make the mistake of assuming her behavior will improve just because you are reasonable about money as, from her point of view, this is not about fairness this is about punishment: you being fair on finances will not diminish her desire to punish.
3. If nothing changes then remember life is long: it is only a matter of time before your children come back to you. So build up your new life and as and when the children want to be a part of it, then great.
Never forget: for your ex wife only she can open the door of her particular prison cell.
I learned that hard lesson with finances a few months back and I know unless she has everything she will not relent which is why I have concluded that going to FH will have a far better result than me giving into her demands. I think Bob sums it up best., "when you got nothin'', you got nothin to lose"..
3 weeks until FDR- but I reckon this will drag out until September...