Seperation

Hello,
My husband and I have been having big problems for the last 5 years or so, and after a long time hoping things will settle down for the sake of our 4 children aged 2, 8, 12, and 16, things are not any better but worse, and we want to seperate. We have 2 properties, one that is rented out and is worth £180.000, (not sure on the exact value or what left to pay, and the house we live in which is worth £250.000 with £160.000 left to pay bank.

He has agreed to sign over the the house, please can anyone state what form or procedure I need to get this done with the solicitor and or if I can do it myself? I know my husband needs to write a letter stating that he signed the houe over to me and that he will have not claim if or when this goes to Divorce.(he is happy to do this so he says) He is not really working his self emplyment has been reduced, and I am not working either, and we are just making ends meet with Tax Credit, and he has said he doesnt want to work neither will he find another job, so I know he wont pay maintenence, also he will go Bangladesh to avoid paying or working, and he knows I wont be able to reach him there.
Even now he doesnt leave even though he says he will, Please can someone tell me what I need to do so this goes smoothly and I don''t leave any issues out of the letter that he need to write, also what do I need to do to get him to sign the house over (even thought I know he supposed to do it, but he says he happy to do it and wants me to do all the work and he wil just sign the house over, and how much will it cost?).
As for the flat he thinks he can have the flat cause he will sign me the house, In my mind I am not sure if I should do anything about the flat because he has already made me sign the flat to him when he remortgaged it and becasue of my bad credit it will only go through in his name so I had unknowingly signed him the flat,for the remortgage, but my name is on the register.So that was that.

It is clear from what you are telling me that you need a bit of help. I''m aware that there may be cultural and/or religious factors involved here and I can''t help you with those.
However, I can tell you, definitely, that you cannot transfer ownership of a house, or land, by writing a letter. At best, a letter is an indication of an intention to transfer it. To actually change the ownership you need a formal transfer. That procedure is not, of itself, particularly complicated and should not cost you an arm and a leg. But a letter would be quite insufficient to transfer the ownership.
Now usually, when you have a couple who are separating or divorcing and they own two properties, what happens in 99% of cases is that one spouse gets one property and the other spouse gets the other. This is obviously common sense.
But I''d say this. You don''t need a piece of paper to live apart. You don''t need a Court order to do it, though sometimes it can be desirable. But the breakdown of a relationship, whether you are married or not, almost always leaves loose ends, and therefore the end of a relationship really makes it desirable that those loose ends be tied up sooner rather than later, leaving both parties free to get on with their lives.
For example, on the end of a relationship the following issues typically arise :
Are there children ? If so, where will they live ? What contact will they have with both parents ? Who will pay for their upkeep and support ?
Where are you going to live ? What is to happen to the marital home ?
Does one party need financial support from the other ? If so, how much and for how long ?
What assets do the parties have and how are they to be shared out ?
Do the parties have pensions and if so, are the pensions to be divided and if so, in what proportions ?
All these are typical issues, and the ideal is that both parties can come to an agreement, and the agreement is then embodied in a Court order so that both parties can be held to their bargain.
I hope that you will find it helpful, it was intended to be. You can always ask further questions which I will do my best to answer. But I hope I have clarified the issues you need to think about.
LMM

Hello,
Thank -you for your prompt reply, I can say that we have decided on children staying with me in the marital home, and he has mentioned he will help with food shoppiing etc and he wants to see the kids on a regular basis and spend time with them here:S , although he has said alot of things and not kept his word, for the last 2 years I have been contributing to the mortgage for the house we live in, and I have been paying bills in full, and on some occasions he has helped.
I am aware the letter is for intention only, and can be used against him if this goes to court but that isnt the problem.
Early last year I put a homerights Order on this house and on the flat,(although My name is still on the deeds for the flat and it wasnt required for the flat)because he was threatening to sell/ remortgage etc. And I did that my self with the land registry, so can I get a form fro the land registry and do the sign over my self?
I have lost count of the times he has said that he will leave but he doesnt.
I am afraid to say in April last year there was an incident where he accused me of seeing someone, by getting a kitchen knife and saying he wanted to kill himself, i called the police, and the social services were involved, and eventually I left the house in June 22 with the children, and with help from the domestic violence unit stayed in temporary accomodation till september, then my family got involved and pressured me to come home,and I did on false promises and false hope that everything will be hunky dory and he will change.In fact the last year has been hell, full of arguing and no sleep, money worries, and bills, degrading abusive language and threats that he will stop paying the mortgage at which point he did, I even tried to finish it then.(although I did stick up for my self,)So I am not in contact with family because he has isolated me, I can''t go out unless he with me, or if i do he will follow me, there is no trust. I can''t go to work because of this. I can''t go out with out an argument and accusation. Or contact a solicitor and see them although I did have one last year during all these problems I just stated.
There are no pensions or savings, just the 2 properties and kids. He has land back home which he denied, but i am not interested in that. I just want to live the rest of my days in peace.
Please Advise the procedure, and what I need for him to sign me the house, thanks, only if after theis has been done and he doesnt leave I will take the next step.

Yes, you can find the forms on the HM Land Registry Site. The one you want is probably TR1.

But having said this, my advice is clear and I hope definite. This is not something you should try to do yourself. I spent years at university learning how to do it.

It is basically a simple transaction but look, I have no financial interest in giving you this advice. I am long since retired and no longer practise.

KMM

hello,

thank you for your reply, it was very helpful, Have a good day.