Hubby refusing to sign :(

Apologies in advance for the long post.

We married almost 14yrs ago after living together for 5yrs. Things started to change quite quickly after we wed, he became overly controlling and abusive to myself and my two boys (now grown up). I ended up trapped and miserable with no where to go, as I had been cut off and forbidden from seeing any friends or family.

In 2012 circumstances caused by his behavior resulted in us both being incarcerated. For me and the boys this was an unfortunate end to a bad relationship, but in reality was a blessing in disguise.

I have not seen him since the conviction and requested that he not be allowed to contact me upon his release. The authorities granted my request, but also made it condition that neither of us contact each other while on licence.

I started divorce proceedings in 2014. I was told as the abuse was all emotional and psychological and that none of it had been reported to the police, I would be unable to use abuse as grounds. So I went for irretrievable breakdown and the time we had been separated.

We both received our copies of the Petition in January 2015. We had now been separated for over 2 1/2 yrs with no contact. I assumed he would just sign and return the papers. But his mother visited and said he was refusing to sign as he thought I might make a claim against him.

I live with my two grown up boys, we are building our life and household back up again from nothing, as I lost everything in 2012.

He lives with his parents, pays nothing towards his upkeep, won''t even go to the job centre to claim benefits. he has nothing.

It is so frustrating as I cannot contact him directly to sort this out. I can''t afford to go to a solicitor and his mother just says she can''t understand why he doesn''t just sign, but she won''t discuss it with him.

I will be able to contact him without breaking my conditions in a few moths time, but he won''t be able to respond. By the time his licence is up and we can both contact each other we will have literally been separated for 5yrs.

Now you have some background information the question I''m asking is:

Will the divorce automatically be granted in 2017 as we will by then have been separated 5yrs, or can he still be awkward and sit on it?

Thank you in advance for any advice or info given.

There are a few options. You have attempted to begin divorce based on 2 years by consent. This only works if consent is forthcoming which is clearly not the case.

You can issue proceedings for unreasonable behaviour but if you can hang on for 5 years this will be the most effective route as there is little to no defence to 5 years separation and it doesn''t require consent from your ex. All you need to do is prove to the court that the Petition was received by your ex which could be his acknowledgement of the petition or proof that it was served by a court bailiff or process server.

Charles

Thank you Charles

I was wondering if this might be the case. I could resend the Petition by bailiff, but I am a bit reluctant to spend anymore on the divorce, Mum has already paid everything so far. However if it proves that he has been in possession of the petition it would be a small price to pay.

I''m happy to sit and wait so long as I get the desired result in the end.

I really don''t understand why he''s doing this. We lived in a rented house, everything went to house clearance and charity shops, so there is literally nothing to fight over. He''s just being awkward for the sake of it.

If I don''t have the petition reserved by bailiff, does that mean he can deny all knowledge of it and hold things up further or is the 5yrs separation a guaranteed final step to completion?