How to get ex out of the house

Hi,

My first post.. am pretty desperate. Ex and I separated 7 months ago, two children - 13 and 10. He won’t leave. The atmosphere is toxic. Im fighting him for the house as I put a six figure sum into it. We are at Nisi and he won’t accept my offer of money and I won’t accept his. He’s controlling.. he plays games to get at me. Stupid games. He’s got a girlfriend and yet still won’t leave. mediation hasn’t worked and he’s meant to have gone to his solicitor yet I think this is a lie as I’ve not heard from them. So it’s looking like the court route.

The kids are really affected. Life is so much easier when he’s not here. It was my weekend for the kids (the only thing we have decided on) and he turned back up tonight and all I’ve done it sit and cry in my box room while he takes over the house again.

I can’t do this anymore. I need him gone. I’ve asked him over and over to
Leave and he just won’t go.

Help!!

Unfortunately you can’t make him go, so your choices are sort it out in court (Takes ages) or leave.
In my case I couldn’t live with the person any more due to their behaviour, so I left, rented privately, lost all my savings in rent, and 2.5 years later after going through court I got my Consent Order, money and bought us a new house.
There is light at the end of the tunnel.
You can’t change a toxic bully. They are just out to cause you as much pain and upset as possible. I personally found it easier to just go and start again. It was the best decision I made. It was like the clouds lifting. It gave me endless energy which had been drained. I was free! This then gave me the strength to fight for my share of 20 years input. It did take a long time through the court route, but only because he was so difficult.
Good luck to you. Life is short.

Its so difficult I could nor bare the thought of living with my ex she was so nasty and abusive that it was impossible imagine a guy being attacked with a knife. To avoid an MPS I had to agree to giving her £700 a month to keep her away from the place we have no kids and she has had loads in the bank which she sent abroad. She claims she does not work but gets money in cash etc. The court have ordered me to pay her until the next hearing.

I just found I had to back down and give the money as living with her would be a nightmare she would be taking anything she found in the house at the first opportunity.

I know its hard just have to bare with it and having kids is a different ball game indeed. The whole process is painful in one way or the other, and not always easy to just walk away so many factors to consider. You can't leave so easily you have to hose the children and they come first. There are options to consider but all takes time

The court process is so tiring expensive and one does not know the outcome but for many of us its the only way to see some light and a glimpse of sanity. All gets sorted in the end

You can apply to the courts for an Occupation order. This will state clearly who can/can't live in house.

Maybe also look at getting a non molestation order if it's appropriate

You need to leave. You will not "win" because you don't get a reward for suffering. It just makes you ill.