Ex wants to take children to Tunisia. I did not give consent owing to terrorism threats in the country. Meanwhile he booked and paid £3000 for this holiday without my consent. He intends to stay in a tourist resort which may be safer than other parts of the country but I''m still beside myself with worry. He said if I don''t allow children to go he will take me to court to sue me for waste of money and will claim for me to pay all court fees. Additionally he threatens to stop paying child support.
Where do I stand with this? Can he take me to court, can he sue me? I''m the parent with residence. He has contact order for one week holiday in summer. I can''t afford Court fees or not to have child support.
He has already been with the children to France and Spain. I''ve no concerns with contact or holiday I just have concerns regarding safety in Tunisia. Can anyone help please? Am I being irrational?
Tunisia: "The overall score has been lowered from high to medium risk but the perils of terrorism and unrest remain the same. Since 2014, the interim government has begun to restore law and order to the country and combat the threat of terrorism, which worsened since the 2011 uprising. The threat is largely contained to Kasserine and Kef. Although political protests have dropped off in scale and intensity, often violent hardship unrest and strike activity continues to take place in the interior provinces."
So, I would share this with your ex so he can be better informed and hopefully it will encourage his vigilance.
I also hope sharing the above doesn''t worry you more but better to acknowledge actual truth than speculate instead I would suggest.
Albeit you share that your ex is being hostile about you attempting to intervene after the fact i.e. after the plans have been made it is a timely note to yourself to try and have better dialogue to avoid that happening again and be ready to raise the discussion ahead of your ex acting in isolation and thus ensuring you are being consulted through your own pro-active pursuit of discussing future plans.
If you still feel this (risk) is not at all something you want your children to be exposed to then rather than contest this directly with your ex, as you have tried, it would be best to seek legal advice to help you do so as the hostility is a firm barrier to your attempt to do so and it would be pointless to continue attempting to do so on your own I suspect though do at least share the information above, as a last chance attempt to better inform them ahead of you seeking legal action to prevent this if that is your wish.
Thank you so much for the detailed reply. It has certainly helped. I need to find out the legal stance too. I don''t want to stop my children having a holiday but this is a worry. Also he booked it AFTER I told him I wasn''t happy and wouldn''t give consent to Tunisia...
I''m seeing a lawyer tomorrow.
As a parent he is entitled to make this decision. If it went to court as its a holiday it is likely that a court would allow the holiday to take place and he is correct that you would be liable for yours and his costs.
Arrangements for children need to be agreed and threats to withhold child maintenance aren''t reasonable. Child maintenance and holidays are different issues dealt with separately under different bits of legislation.
In Scotland it is an offence under the Children (Scotland) Act 1995 to take a child out of the UK without the consent of the other parent. When no agreement about taking children abroad for a holiday can be reached either parent may apply to court for decision. Each case is then heard separately and depends on it''s own merits.
Although a sheriff has the discretion to award expenses against a parent who has *unreasonably* withheld their consent for a holiday abroad the Foreign and Commonwealth Office Office are currently advising against all travel in some parts of Tunisia, and all but essential travel in other parts, so it isn''t unreasonable to be concerned about the safety of children.
If you are on a low income you may be eligible for legal aid and a family solicitor or mediator in possession of all the facts are in the best position to advise where you stand. It may be possible resolve the dispute through negotiation rather than going to court.
A wise father would understand safety concern if talked to.Father could ask for bookings to be changed to some other safe country from the same travel company(at a cost of course ,which depends on travel company''s policy,if possible)The cost of extra payment could be borne by the mother thinking it to be resolution expenditure instead of paying big solicitor and court fee.
I know it looks as an absurd answer but may be it works.This all if matter is to be settled amicably.