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Desperate ex son in law won''t return daughter to h

  • Wendy1964
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5 years 1 week ago #467170 by Wendy1964
My daughter and husband are separated and have a 3 yr old they have informal agreement between themselves for 50/50 access but daughter is registered as living at mums and she has been main carer, she buys all clothing and needs her daughter has. This has worked well. My daughter has been suffering from depression and has self harmed but never while she has her daughter at home. This weekend things came to a head where my daughter had been binge drinking all night and her new partner phoned husband explaining daughters not well. New partner was taking care of the child,as daughter was in bed. Husband and daughter n her new partner had had volatile relationship verbally since she met him ... Husband didn''t want the split so resents new partner even though he wasn''t on the scene when they split.....anyhow partner thought he was doing right thing saying my daughter is struggling? Husband rang me demanding now wats Sat, I goin him n explained daughter is getting help but it takes time to get appointments with professional services but regularly sees go in meantime. Husband stated he was going the house .. my daughters ... as he could not get answer off her phone ... he then telephoned to say he got no answer at the door n granddaughter was wandering round the house on her own. I went as I have a key. Once I arrived they were all talking and husband stated he was unhappy with daughter wandering so he would have my grandchild for 1 week to give my daughter respite. This seemed a good idea. Since the husband has changed n things are getting nasty, he won''t return the child or allow access saying she is at risk. I''ve spoken to new partner who explained he had been with the child but ran upstairs when he knew dad was at door thinking he had come to have a go. Daughter has seeked professional help again she has admitted she was wrong getting drunk n leaving partner responsible with her daughter,admitting she was at crisis point. Daughter has rang nursery who have no concerns for the child or her parenting, she''s rang children''s services but they can''t help because there is not any safeguarding been raised. He tried to stop me visiting saying child says she doesn''t want see me but surprise surprise when I went of course she did. He says she doesn''t want see her mum but asked me where mummy is ..I''ve tried explain to him she is 3 n not capable of understanding consequences of saying don''t want see mummy, she has said don''t want see daddy to her mum before but fine once there. I''m at my wits end n desperately need some advice to share with my daughter as this is not helping her state of mind.

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5 years 1 week ago #467175 by WYSPECIAL
Hi,

sounds like an awful situation for you and your daughter needs help and your support.

Your (ex?) son in law is clearly exercising his parental responsibility and looking after your grand daughter.

Do you have a specific question that you are seeking help with?

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5 years 6 days ago #467194 by Wendy1964
My daughter wants her child back home with her, and to be able to see her while at her dads. I know the dad is using his parental rights to care for his daughter but it''s coming across that he''s using this to get back at my daughter. He won''t allow the child to see her even while supervised or talk on the phone. My daughter has seemed help this week and recognised what happened last weekend cannot happen again. The child has never been affected by my daughters illness, she always been looked after improbably.

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5 years 6 days ago #467198 by Wendy1964
Sorry last word should read impecibally ... predictive text ...

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