Really hoping that someone has been in a similar situation or knows something about this as I am losing ALL hope in solicitors and the court system.
My ex wife lives in our martial home with our 7 year old son and her new boyfriend who works full time. (who my son hates, but that's for a different part of the forum!)
She has no rent or mortgage to pay as I owned the house outright before I met her. When we first decided to divorce it was all quite amicable and we agreed to sell the house and spilt the money 50/50. I agreed to stay with my parents until this was done.
I had an agreement drawn up with a solicitor and she was happy with this until.......she went on holiday, met this guy (the new boyfriend) and next thing I know she'd refusing to sell the house and has moved him in.
I would never see my son unhappy so I then proposed that we do a 60 (for her)/40 spilt of the money but she still refuses to sell.
I have worked out that she would have enough money to privately rent in the same area for about 25 years with the 60% she would get. My son is unhappy living where he is anyway so it is not making it any better for him to stay there.
She just wants to basically live in this house rent free.
Until it is sold I have literally nothing. If my parents had not let me stay I would be in a hostel.
What can I do. Please can anyone help I'm getting to the end of my tether and losing all hope.
Are you actually divorced? Is the house still in your sole name? What was the agreement you drew up? Was it ever submitted to the courts for approval?
If it wasn't, you have no legally binding financial settlement in place. If you are divorced, AFAIK she has no right to remain in a property in your name - and her boyfriend certainly has no right to be there.
If you do have a court approved Consent Order, you can go back to court to enforce it.
Thanks for your reply. I am actually divorced yes. The house is in my sole name. The agreement was drawn up but when it came to sign it she refused.
My solicitor has now more or less said that unless I take her to court, and I haven't got the money to do this as it's all tied up in the house, she will proberly get to stay there until my son is 18. This leaves me with 11 years living at my parents, as I cannot afford to get anywhere else until the house is sold. I'm totally in limbo and unable to move on until the house has been sold. No idea what to do now
It does sound like court may be the option to take. If you represent yourself it need not cost a fortune. There are services available via this site to help you with paperwork.
You would have to have a clear plan for how her housing needs, and those of your son, will be met. Does she work? Could she get a mortgage?
Also it may be worth taking advice about whether her new partner could be served notice to quit.
Any financial settlement on divorce will depend on your respective needs and the means you have between you to meet them.
The length of the marriage plus any cohabitation is an important factor. Your respective ages and incomes will also count.
As the mortgage is paid in full the 60% of the sale would mean she could privately rent in the same area for 25 years at least. She wouldn't be able to get a mortgage as doesn't work and never has for years. The boyfriend works but came over the live in my house from Greece only in this October last year so I doubt he would have built up a credit rating in this country yet to enable him to get a mortgage.
Where is the best place for me to look on this site for more info for this going forward?
If the divorce settlement didn't include ancillary relief re your ex staying in the property until your son turns 18 then you can apply for an order for sale as your ex and her new partner have no rights to your home, especially since you have offered her half the equity in your solely owned property.
You say that the agreement wasn't signed but if you have the document and some other proof that this had been agreed by your ex, ie texts/ emails from to your ex and/or correspondence with the solicitor who drew up the agreement then the judge, on the balance of probabilities, will allow the document to be used in evidence.
Based on what you have said I feel that you have a good case and would be able to represent yourself in court, for a fraction of the price, with the necessary assistance and guidance to prepare and submit your court application.
As long as your son's welfare is taken into account, which it will be since your ex will have at least half of the equity and therefore be able to rent a place somewhere nearby (if she can't afford a mortgage), then your application should be straightforward. Your ex does also have a partner who no doubt will be able to share the cost of rent.
Indeed it does hinge on having a sealed consent order, a signed consent order or documentary evidence that the order was drawn up to meet her requests. If she doesn't work, then what ties bind her to the area where the house is? Has an order for the welfare of the children been drawn up yet? Certainly the new boyfriend has no rights to live in the house rent free. Have you considered drawing up an occupation rent agreement? Fix the amount that she has to give you for living in the property, even if that amount is deducted from what you give her for her upkeep and that of the children?