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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


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Can I fight Court Cots

  • loulou1969
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13 Oct 09 #154183 by loulou1969
Topic started by loulou1969
Hi
I am in the process of going through a very un-amicable divorce.

My Ex bullied me into getting things underway and consultanting a solicitor. He then did not instruct his solicitor until 3 months later.

By this time I had stated the ball rolling with the proceedings. Before he saw his solicitor he was writing to mine on a regualar basis, which obv meant I incurred more costs.

We stated proceedings and I cited UB as the reason and asked him to pay half the costs.

He has now decided to contest the divorce (which my solicitor said she has not heard of anyone doing that in years) and also is cross petitioning me for unreasonable behaviour and asking me to pay all costs!

He is making out that I am the main breadwinner (he earns 3 times as much as me)

I simply cannot afford all his costs esp as he is also dragging out the process.

So I am going to make him an offer towards costs and if he refuses then I think I have no other option but for him to take me to court.

Does anyone know if he did take me to court over costs would I have any chance in winning?

We both have enourmous debts and to be honest if I was taken to court then I feel I would have no other option if he was granted the costs than to go bankrupt.

I have proof of how much he earns and how he is not paying a penny towards his own debts or has not made a contribution to the mortgage since he left the house (of his own free will - I had left, but he wanted to move into a flat, so I had to move back in and keep the house going)

I'm sorry this is so long winded, but it is complicated and I just want to know if I stand any chance whatsoever of winning if he takes me to court?

Any advice would be really appreciated!

  • nbm1708
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13 Oct 09 #154198 by nbm1708
Reply from nbm1708
There are two scenario's:

first is if you have your divorce petition in first and it suceeds on the basis of UB then you can ask that the respondent pays the costs for the actual divorce part as well as his costs (each party pays their own for the financials and children unless exceptional circumstances of proceedings misconduct).

second if he's cross petitioning and has filed his petition second then worst case scenario from this I can only see a judge awarding costs on the basis that each party pays their own and that your ex is just wasting money on the actual divorce bit by cross petitioning which will be frowned on. His threats re paying all his costs are just that - threats and should be ignored.

T

  • loulou1969
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13 Oct 09 #154211 by loulou1969
Reply from loulou1969
Hi

Thanks for your reply

My Petition was in first, but my solicitor as advise that we drop it (obv not at the moment she said it costs nothing just to keep it there) In my peitition I only asked for half of the court costs.

I will let his peition go through undefended (although I will not admit to what he has put my unreasonable behaviour as)

My solicitor seemed to say he will be granted costs but I just can't see if I can prove his earnings and how I am struggling? Is any of that taken in account?

Can I assume that worse case is, that if he is granted costs, he has to pay his solicitor and the pursue me himself?

All so messy :(

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14 Oct 09 #154328 by nbm1708
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Basically if you drop your Petition and just divorce on his petition against you for UB then the chances are he will get costs awarded and you will have to pay for his costs for the divorce bit. The judge will only see his docs.

How much he does or does not have won't come into it as that is taken into account in the financials part of the divorce not in the divorce itself.

I'd continue going through on your petition as best case you end up with him paying your costs worst case you end up paying your own only.

T

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14 Oct 09 #154339 by loulou1969
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As he is contesting my Petition the solicitor has advised to go along with his one.

If he is awarded costs - can I then contest that?

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14 Oct 09 #154373 by nbm1708
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You can try but the chances are it will just be dismissed and then left up to your ex to apply for an enforcement order should you not pay.

T

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14 Oct 09 #154383 by loulou1969
Reply from loulou1969
Thanks so much for you help.

Part of me thinks just pay it and don't argue but the other part thinks stuff him!

So if I don't pay he has to take me to court to get the money. Then that is fine, as I just do not have the money...

Nothing is ever easy. It's a joke that if you don't contest it you are liable for all the costs, they really should take into account such things as salaries etc - but I guess that is just the law so not much you can do

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