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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


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attitude at court fail to pay maintenance

  • jelly4toes
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24 Mar 08 #17576 by jelly4toes
Topic started by jelly4toes
1st hearing coming up house in neg eq he is refusing to pay maintenance as from last month i am down 1000k hence was forced into bankruptcy last week and now won't be able to meet half mortgage unless he pays the maintenance due..his original plan was for us to both pay half till child is 16 and than split profit.i then got a txt saying ur getting f all from me bitch.(nice)
what will the courts view be that he failed to keep paying maintenance and we are in this mess possibly facing repo he is on 60k .he is still paying half the mort ie 1082 a month ,will ct say that covers his 500 maintenance and more besides.i am so worried about where we are to live.i am besides myself.

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25 Mar 08 #17588 by Ephelia
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As you've a child, surely they will make him pay what's necessary to keep a roof over your heads? He's clearly a monster - what man would do this when it has such an impact on his own child? What job does he do? Is it one that would be affected by bad publicity? Surely being taken to court for failing to provide the basics for his own child would shame him into helping?

Sorry, as usual can't do much more than despair at your situation and wish I could do more to help than send you hugs over the internet. I do worry about you; take care.

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25 Mar 08 #17595 by jelly4toes
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he is a monster last week stuff came through the post addressed to him about a place at private boarding school for daughter 6k per term .meanwhile he is making sure were homeless.last night daughter came home saying daddy said i could meet j soon.this is the woman he filled in the acknowledgment of service for divorce saying i have not committed adultery with the r nor any other person nor have i ever resided at r's address.when he clearly does and i have pr detective's report to say so.moving forward is so hard.seems impossible.i so feel like stopping contact until he can take financial responsibility for our child.

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25 Mar 08 #17598 by Ephelia
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I think you have the patience of a saint. I couldn't have continued to remain so neutral in conversations with my daughter as you obviously have (you must have if she'd still willing to see him). You deserve huge praise for that. I do believe that in most cases its best if a child can have a relationship with both parents (however flawed) but maintaining that can NEVER be easy - I'm so in awe of you.

As for boarding school - that's evil; and I speak as someone who had two daughters go through boarding school - they wanted to go (an escape from their father) and they loved it but they knew people who were sent against their will and that was so very harmful.

Stay strong and keep in touch.

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28 Mar 08 #17877 by Mrs Ingledew
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My son is at boarding school - and it is the making of him!

My ex is also a SH1T. He doesn't see children and ahs paid nothing towards them since he left in June. Has even borrowed money from our 14 yr old son!!

Keep smiling - it does get better...

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28 Mar 08 #17911 by Fiona
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The problem here appears to be the size of the mortgage. Maintenance is usually awarded according to the needs of one party and the ability to pay of the other so we need to look the overall picture. How much are his net earnings, has he debts he is paying and what % of his income is the mortgage? If he has the ability to pay and assuming you haven't already done so, you may apply for a court order for 'maintenance pending suit' to cover you until the settlement is thrashed out and if the court considers he has been unreasonable it might order him to pay costs.

As far as boarding school is concerned courts generally see the status quo as being in the best interest of children and are unlikely to order changes which aren' t essential at the unsettling time of divorce.

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29 Mar 08 #17936 by jelly4toes
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he hets 7ok a year and is paying a lot into enhanced senior manager nhs pension.he has 30k of trumped up debt gets 4k take home.half the mort is 1082 each i was made bankrupt 2 weeks ago not poss to keep paying all house now 30k neg eq if i hand keys back to bs we have nowhere to go he is enjoying the good life in the girlfriends 600k house.he has a flat which has been a decoy he takes rent boys there and goes cottaging nearby.not sure what the new rich girlfriend/nhs director girlfriend will feel about that!500 rent a month on that.im earn 30k a year and now i am br i can just about manage half the mortgage.i figure staying here will let me rebuilt some credit status and when child is 18 i will have a suitable deposit.or we throw towel in and go homeless.my child only knows this house area as her home.

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