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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.


Not Feeling Optimistic....

  • scottishlady
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07 Jan 08 #10183 by scottishlady
Topic started by scottishlady
I have my 'First Appointment' on 4th Feb.....
I fear that I am not going to fair very well....
My STBX has claimed that he has lost 'all the money gambling'...approx 20K... and his P45 came in the post just before christmas... so, although I don't think it is the case... he is going to say that he is unemployed....
So... it is going to look like he has no money... and no job.....
Now, although I know that he is trying to be deceptive.... a judge isn't going to know this...
I fear that he will say that he can no longer pay the mortgage (£331 per month)... and a judge will say we have to sell the house...
I am aware that somewhere down the line our house will have to be sold, and I accept this.... but, I believe he has infact just hidden 'the money'... and may very well be working... so, it seems to me, that he will succeed in outwitting everyone, and I will be left without a home... whilst, he, once again, gets everything his way...
Is there nothing that can be done?
SL:(

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07 Jan 08 #10185 by GSS
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Hiya

I am in a similar position where my X2B is pleading poverty. She does not work and has not for the previous 17 years.
I expressed my fears to my solicitor regarding her taking me to the cleaners and his answer was that we should go through financial disclosure. This can be done via mediation or through solicitors. Once the forms are completed they are swopped and you both have the opportunity to question each others submissions.

I am doing mine through solicitors as my X2B will not go to mediation, and my solicitor has requested both of us swear the statements to be truthful and sign as such on the forms.

Hoping to swop forms in next weeks so will keep you posted on what happens and if this results in a clear position before we start to negotiate splitting the assets etc..

Keep your head held high, you have done nothing wrong.:)

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08 Jan 08 #10190 by scottishlady
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Thankyou GSS...
Yes, I can hold my head high... but I fear that won't help me keep a roof over my head... but thanks for the kind words.
My Financial discloure was completed, and sworn.... had to be filed at court by 31st Dec... which has been done... I have yet to hear whether his has been done, and filed.... but, again.... I fear that it is going to say exactly as I wrote above... No income and no money... which I know to be false...
I am aware that I can raise 'questions' re his disclosure....I'm just not at all confident that, even then... the truth can be found...
My STBX has no qualms about telling lies to anyone... and will take whatever steps necessary to protect 'his money'...
To be honest...I just don't see any way that he will be shown for the liar that he is...
I have always said that all I want is 'fair settlement'... but I fear I won't even get that...

Kind Regards
SL:(

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08 Jan 08 #10191 by loobyloo
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scotish hi
My x2b has successfully lied hidden funds etc from courts.... I had fdr in dec but nothing sorted hes hell bent on not parting with his funds hes a clever man... I have to now face 2 day fh on or after 28th march pay for barrister etc and the stress of it all
I am holding out that some sort of justice will be done after all this is a democracy we live in ha ha
Me and kids have been totally erased from his life... he has even ignored csa
anyway each case different but at that 1st appt not much happens , i had 3 cos he never filed form E etc
good luck keep us posted
looby

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08 Jan 08 #10195 by Specialdad
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Keep focusing on what you need for your children and yourself.

Assume always that the ex is lying, try to prove otherwise, if you cant prove it forget it.

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08 Jan 08 #10203 by scottishlady
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Thanks for your comments....
Looby...I understand totally what you are saying.... my husband is also quite clever, and I feel that he will succeed in outwitting everyone, including solicitors and judges... but, like you, I am hoping that someone somewhere down the line will see what he is doing, and hopefully there may be (don't hold your breath though) some justice...

Specialdad... thankyou again for commenting...
There are no children involved... just our 'grown up' daughter...
So.... is the onus on myself to 'prove' that he hasn't infact gambled away all this money, and to prove that he is working when he claims he isn't?
SL:(

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08 Jan 08 #10204 by loobyloo
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SL my x2b said he gave his dad money as present, lent money to his brother, and had basically opened and closed 17 accounts in as many weeks!!! do these damn judges actually go through the court bundles... they need to, its awful when a few good men out there are doing the right thing... trust me to pick a duff....
looby

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