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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


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What next ?

  • megan
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23 Jan 08 #11597 by megan
Topic started by megan
He e-mailed me on my birthday last week to tell me he wouldn't pay anymore of the bills. Today I found out he had fraudulantly set up a direct debit on my account so he wouldn't have to pay cancellation fee on the contract. Bank said I could notify police but as I found it befor any money taken out didn't seem worth it.
It's only 2 months since he left but I delt with it without tears and drama.I think I may be moving on!!!

  • Josh2008
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23 Jan 08 #11601 by Josh2008
Reply from Josh2008
Would have been a good idea to at least have informed the police about this fraudulent transaction or compose a letter to him pointing out that any further instances will be reported to them

They would most likely not take it any further, police time etc.., but they would write to him about it as a case matter, that would frighten him into not doing it again, unless of course he likes prison food......LOL

Nice to see someone moving on after such a short time, shows that you really didn't care about him...


Good Luck

  • megan
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23 Jan 08 #11603 by megan
Reply from megan
Oh I cared but managing a conversation without crying is my idea of moving on. Little steps!

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23 Jan 08 #11604 by Josh2008
Reply from Josh2008
The tears do come back it's inevitable, hopefully they start to subside and it's just part of the process, I thought I was over that bit.

But no, it still hurts when I think of all the years seemingly down the proverbial drain

I think we go though a process of it's not happening, anger, bitterness, anxiety, unknowing the future, whatever that may be, lots and lots of different emotions

  • Ladybelle
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23 Jan 08 #11614 by Ladybelle
Reply from Ladybelle
I get hurt when I think of 25 years, but I cant think they are wasted because I have my wonderful children. but I still get angry now rather than tearful for now. But I have everything still to organise. I am kind of in limbo. I am sure I will lose the house, he is paying mortgage for now but he wont pay that forever.
I spent for the first fortnight in permanent tears, couldnt watch anything or hear a song but now I am stronger and over that.
it is true time heals, but I am terrified about the future. I cant have any dealings with him right now. He emailed me too to say he wasnt paying as much next month and that just totally churned me right up again.
I dont know how I will ever cope with the actual divorce or any final settlement.
*sigh*
I just go day to day for now.

  • rubytuesday
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25 Jan 08 #11894 by rubytuesday
Reply from rubytuesday
"Nice to see someone moving on after such a short time, shows that you really didn't care about him..."

Bit harsh, I thought! I got a similar letter from mine yesterday. I dealt with it by making an appointment at the solicitors to start divorce proccedings. And yes I did care, and still do.

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