A well respected, award winning social enterprise
Volunteer run - Government and charity funded
We help 50,000 people a year through divorce

01202 805020

Lines open: Monday to Friday 9am-5pm
Call for FREE expert advice & service info

What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.

Need advice - unemployed xtb, BIG spending spree!

  • DragenOnnn
  • DragenOnnn's Avatar Posted by
  • New Member
  • New Member
05 Feb 08 #12924 by DragenOnnn
Topic started by DragenOnnn
for background see my blog.
My unemployed x2b is moving into a brand new Letted property at £525/month. I can only assume paid by MiL(from Hell). As a comparison, I bring home £1700/mth and mortgage interest is £410/mth.
I live in S.Wales on a below average(nationally) wage.
I need to know - would i ever be expected to meet the costs of someone who point blank refuses to live in the real world!!!?
It's my fault for snooping (and i know i'll be chided for doing it), but as I've "blogged" previously, she (x2b)spends so much time napping that I couldn't resist an open bag with receipts poking out. If you could empathize with the mental anguish (i've just been refered to a consultant psychiatrist) I'm going through you may understand why I snooped.:(
I've also had to sit back and wonder how she is going to pay/paid for: 2 new beds (hers and my StepSon), a LeatherLeaders £600 suite, new TV,... it goes on.
I have worked all my life and over the last 10 years since divorcing my FW I've slowly been getting myself back on my feet. I'm totally flabbergasted how she can have the confidence to get all this "stuff" without massive financial support and dependence from her mother (who's over 60 & works in a council office) and stepfather?
I came to the conclusion a month ago that I couldn't afford to get divorced and we'd have to separate, which is why I went to mediation but my x2b still refuses to go to the preliminary appointment. But the anxiety is just killing me that she may attempt to recover totally unreasonable living costs from me.
Sorry for ramblin' - i have no one else to rant to.:unsure:

  • DragenOnnn
  • DragenOnnn's Avatar Posted by
  • New Member
  • New Member
05 Feb 08 #12959 by DragenOnnn
Reply from DragenOnnn
i've also found out that she's moving out on the 15th. i plan to disappear over the weekend and booked time off at work as a result. i doubt i'll have much left in the house after she's left.

  • dumped2
  • dumped2's Avatar
  • Junior Member
  • Junior Member
05 Feb 08 #12975 by dumped2
Reply from dumped2
Do you think she may have had a little win on the lottery. I won £7000 on sat (hot pick 4) I couldn't believe my luck as life has mysterious ways of turning ok when needed. It couldn't have come at a better time. I have no intentons of telling H as I need to have as much cash as poss if we do decide on a defo split.
For those that have saw my blog - my H wants us to try at relationship now. I am not so sure but not making any hast decisions after 23 years tgthr.

Your guess at help from mil is prob good guess and why would she not want to help her daughter if she could. You are still a child to your parent whatever your age. i assume she needs something to sit on.to be on 1700 take home pay is not below average pay on any survey i have read. you must be on approx 28000-29000 pre tax ave income on survey i have read is 25000.

  • loobyloo
  • loobyloo's Avatar
  • Visitor
  • Visitor
06 Feb 08 #12991 by loobyloo
Reply from loobyloo
Dumped congrats on your win
was talking bout that the other day ive got fh soon and wondered if I won the 95million on fri should i declare it !!!! seriously , id give the ticket to my mum i thinks
anyway good luck hope you 2 sort it out.

Well your marriage obviously over , she has moved on however she has financed it
I would do the same iff i were you
be careful in the early stages and think actions through
all the best

Moderators: wikivorce teamrubytuesdaydukeyhadenoughnowTetsSheziLinda SheridanForsetiMitchumWhiteRoseLostboy67WYSPECIALBubblegum11

The modern, convenient and affordable way to divorce.

No-Fault Divorce £179

We provide the UK's lowest cost no-fault divorce service, managed by a well respected firm of solicitors. 

Online Mediation £250

Online mediation is a convenient and inexpensive way to agree on a fair financial settlement.

Consent Order £259

This legally binding agreement defines how assets (e.g. properties and pensions) are to be divided.

Court Support £250

Support for people who have to go to court to get a fair divorce financial settlement without a solicitor.