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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.


Do you need help sorting out a fair financial settlement?

Our consultant service offers expert advice and support to help you reach agreement on a fair financial settlement quickly, and for less than a quarter of the cost of using a traditional high street solicitor.


Help me decide !!

  • Ladybelle
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09 Feb 08 #13334 by Ladybelle
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Fiona wrote:

Please go for it. I don't think I could cope with the virtual handwringing if you don't. ;)

Trust me you will feel better doing something. :cheer:


hehehehehehehehe you know me so well already Fiona !!! *sigh* Do you recommend the sol letter or my letter then ?

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09 Feb 08 #13340 by attilladahun
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Solicitor is asking for financial details and by doing so is attempting quite properly to follow the ancilary relief protocol.

Link is here:

lawsociety.org.uk/documents/downloads/dynamic/flppart4.pdf

If you have evidence to prove is adultery I advise you get things moving in a week or 2 ...remember one matters are sorted out you feelings of fear of the unknown will go and you will know where you stand and you will be strong enough to deal with it...

One door closes another opens!

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11 Feb 08 #13455 by Fiona
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Annie,

As Attilla says lawyers must follow a protocol and they are obliged to present information in an organized and intelligible way. To keep costs down use your lawyer efficiently and effectively by providing complete and accurate information in a timely manner. It's a good idea to write down concise points you wish to clarify and keep meetings/phone calls brief and focussed. Be wary of using your lawyer as a counsellor.

Think of the positives here. Not only did you make a decision to consult a lawyer you actually managed to go out to meet him. Well done! :)

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11 Feb 08 #13456 by Fiona
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Annie,

As Attilla says lawyers must follow a protocol and they are obliged to present information in an organized and intelligible way. To keep costs down use your lawyer efficiently and effectively by providing complete and accurate information in a timely manner. It's a good idea to write down concise points you wish to clarify and keep meetings/phone calls brief and focussed. Be wary of using your lawyer as a counsellor.

Think of the positives here. Not only did you make a decision to consult a lawyer you actually managed to go out to meet him. Well done! :)

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11 Feb 08 #13464 by Ladybelle
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attilladahun wrote:

Solicitor is asking for financial details and by doing so is attempting quite properly to follow the ancilary relief protocol.

Link is here:

lawsociety.org.uk/documents/downloads/dynamic/flppart4.pdf

If you have evidence to prove is adultery I advise you get things moving in a week or 2 ...remember one matters are sorted out you feelings of fear of the unknown will go and you will know where you stand and you will be strong enough to deal with it...

One door closes another opens!


That link was really interesting thank you. I have saved it. What do you mean by evidence ? He admitted it and moved in with her - is that enough or do I need physical proof ? I have an email with his new address on ?
As far as timings, over the weekend I have thought at length - and discussed with children and family, and I will just hold off for a couple months and then do it. I have a lot of family events the next couple months, and have only just been granted the tax credit and so many things are happening, I just dont think I can do one more thing.
The first 3 months I floundered and nearly drowned, these next 3 have/will be me refocusing and planning.
He still will have no idea if I suddenly file in a couple months. I cant start it until I am totally ready and I'm not quite there yet. I hadnt planned to do it at all, so in the space of a few weeks now, I now am planning to do it - so for me especially, that is HUGE progress :)

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11 Feb 08 #13465 by Ladybelle
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Fiona wrote:

Annie,

As Attilla says lawyers must follow a protocol and they are obliged to present information in an organized and intelligible way. To keep costs down use your lawyer efficiently and effectively by providing complete and accurate information in a timely manner. It's a good idea to write down concise points you wish to clarify and keep meetings/phone calls brief and focussed. Be wary of using your lawyer as a counsellor.

Think of the positives here. Not only did you make a decision to consult a lawyer you actually managed to go out to meet him. Well done! :)


Well I only got there with my sister again, that's another issue that concerns me, she is getting fed up with all these appointments she has to take me to as she has moved house, so that is one thing holding me back as I wont be able to get there. Although can things be done on phone or email ? Is the charge the same ?
What sort of cost is it for a phone call ? or email ?

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11 Feb 08 #13499 by IKNOWNOW
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Annie,

There are people that can help you with getting to appointments and things. Do you have a link with any charities, eg mind or something similar? Do you have a link worker through your GP, I don't believe you will be dealing with your agoraphobia all on your own.

Are you on Disability Benefits etc, have you checked out whether you are eligable for Legal Assistance?

Sure some sort of advocacy service could help you with all this.

Personally, I think the longer you put things off the harder it will be.

Take care, Sarah

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