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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

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The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

A Consent Order is a legally binding document that finalises a divorcing couple's agreement on property, pensions and other assets.

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im lost where do i go?

  • Sera
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07 Aug 07 #1810 by Sera
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I'm not sure what you're asking? Are you are asking if your marriage is legal in the UK?

My dad was from Pakistan, my parents married at a Registry office wedding in London.

When my dad wanted a divorce, (as a Moslem) he said to my mum "I divorce thee, I divorce thee, I divorce thee"!!!

He said that if he said that, he would then be legally divorced from her (this was 1966). My mum replied that this wasn't Pakistan, and cited their UK marriage certificate.

A few years ago, Mick Jagear maaried Jerry Hall in Bali (I think Bali?) but when they split up, he stated that they weren't legally married... (anyone remember that case?)

I thought I'd read that 'If a ceremony to conduct a wedding is legally binding in any country, it would be legally recognised in the UK, including even if a wife had been swapped for a sack of potatoes, or a few goats'.

You will probably need to specify what kind of marriage you had, any certificate? Then approach a lawyer specialising in international laws. (In my area of London there are a lot of Asian lawyers, so they may be first point of call). Or ask the Pakistani Embassy maybe?

Your husband may not recognise that he even needs to formally divorce you. (I don't know the Moslim ways).... so find out what documents exist, then ask a solicitor how to get a divorce. It may take five years seperation (under UK rule) but you may have already done a few of those?

Re: Childs benefit. I would apply for that also. If you don't want / need it yourself, then take it for your child, and have a savings account.

Good Luck.

(I'm not a legal person just a UK/Asian lady with a similar background to yours!)

  • shivers
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11 May 08 #22086 by shivers
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Hi Jina & Sera,

Just wanted to say as a UK Muslim who got married in Pakistan and is now divorcing in the UK, the law is a mess in the UK when it comes to foreign marriages.

Firstly when it comes to recognising the marriage in the UK, if the marriage wasn't registered in the UK, then the parties have to rely on their marriage certificate from the country they were married in. This is conditional upon the certificate being in English as well and having all the necessary stamps on it from the relevant government agencies to attest it. In my case, my Nika Nama was in English and registered at the Pakistani High Commission in London as well as the Foreign Office in Lahore. But, the my S2BX nicked off with the English copy when she didn't want to be married anymore.

The problem is that the courts will only recognise an official marriage certificate so without that, the only other proof of marriage is that one of the couple swears an affidavit that a marriage did exist as well as shows documented proof that they have done everything they can to obtain a copy of the marriage certificate from their S2BX or from the place where it was registered abroad.

So if anyone who has had a foreign marriage is looking at this post and is thinking of getting a divorce, register the foreign marriage in the UK first. This is obviously really difficult if your S2BX isn't cooperating with you during the last stages of your relationship but at least make 10 copies of the English copy of your marriage certificate and store them safely with trusted friends or relatives. Believe me, it will save you from at least 1 year of delay from your divorce.

  • jina
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11 May 08 #22114 by jina
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ive asked plenty of times for a divorce no-body in my family will help, maybe im not destind for happiness, but saying that my little boy is my life, i just want to start fresh, its a killer.......i havnt got me nikkah papers he hid them and destroyed the original one in pakistan so i havnt got any luck........

  • shivers
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11 May 08 #22136 by shivers
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Hi Jina, everyone has a right to happiness in their life, that includes you. You're obviously very dedicated to your little boy and mash'allah that is a blessing both for him and you as well.

I think it would be good to get some advice about this, everyone's situation is different. Being a guy, I've limited experience of women's support networks but I've heard a name of a group called the Southall Black Sisters association: www.southallblacksisters.org.uk/

They do a lot of work to support women who might be at risk of violence if worst came to worst. I haven't conversed with them before and I don't know what they could offer but perhaps they would be a good place to start. Would you be confident enough to give them a call to ask what you could do?

  • havelazyhusband
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05 Jun 08 #24893 by havelazyhusband
Reply from havelazyhusband

Birmingham central mosque will be able to help you.

A friend in the same situation as yourself has been granted a talaq via the mosque. Please do give them a call.

  • DIY Divorce
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05 Jun 08 #24905 by DIY Divorce
Reply from DIY Divorce
Hello havelazyhusband,

just to let you know i havebitchyrichcheatingcowwife! That gives us something in common! :P

You do not have a marriage certificate valid in the UK. You live in the UK! At this point i would like to suggest that you do not have a valid marriage within uk law.

Saying that, you have a religious boundry only you can choose to cross.

This is a moral dilemma, and as i see it, it is the choice of western law to provide a normal backround for your child without the interference of your "husband" or it is the muslim law, which i know nothing about. However it includes your family and friends.

What i will say is this:

This is going to be the toughest decision of your life, however it will be the right decision whichever you choose!

Good luck, and give your baby a squeeze from all of us.

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