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Don't know where to turn

  • glennt
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11 Sep 07 #3182 by glennt
Topic started by glennt
Hi All,

My x to b and I started as work colleagues and friends, I am know 34 and until I met my x2b I had never had a relationship before. We lived together for 2 years prior to getting married but our sex life was never anything to right home about and ever after 3 years of marriage I could probably count on two hands how many times and it was always an issue with her and I felt rejected.

I am diabetic and as a result I have infertility issues, as such last year before our third anniversary we went throught an unsuccessful circle of IVF.
After that she shut me out completely, I tried everything I could think off to make her happy, but it failed.

My suspicions where comfirmed about 7 weeks ago that she has been having a seedy affair with a policeman, (she works for the police as a PCSO), and when I found out she moved out into her mum and dad's and told me she needed to think and that it was already over between them and how sorry she was, etc, etc and then last week I found out that 2 days after I found out she was with him again and has continued to see him ever though he is in another relationship and is living with the other girl.

My x2b has a habit of writing down texts in a notebook and the things they have got up to, she has never ever hinted to with me, she would just lie there with me, and I just accepted it because I love her.

Rage don't not come into it, I could quite happily take him out right now, but I have no desire what so ever to harm my x2b. Stupidly I would take her back tomorrow. In my eyes, my word is my bond, the vows I spoke were for keeps, til death us do part, forsaken all others, etc and my family keep telling me that she has broken those vows, but in my head, I made them and they are forever. Help, any advice!!!!!

Sorry to bore on but I just feel like I want tocurl up and die at the moment, not that I would ever do anything stupid but I don't know where to turn.

Started the petition and told her that I am going to tell his girl-friend, but!!! I don't know.

  • gone1
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11 Sep 07 #3184 by gone1
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Hi Glen. Yes vows are for life. Well until one of you decides that they dont mean anything. Takes 2 to make a marriage and 1 to break it.

Your family is right. She broke her vows so you are off the hook as far as that relationship is concerened. Its not your fault that you are diabetic.

I know what its like to lose someone. I did. I thought it was forever but it wasnt to be. I count myself lucky to be out of it. You will in time.

I had a lucky escape. I am glad she did what she did now as it would have happned anyway sooner or later.

I know how you feel. Its terrible that your life has been turned inside out. What of this man she is with? He is no good if he is with someone else and with your wife as well? What kind of man takes another mans wife? A bad one that is. So they deserve each other mate.

Dont do anything drastic to her or him. Just divorce her sad sorry arse. They are not worth it and all you will do is get yourself in hot water.

One day you will meet a nice lady. Someone who will love you for you. Not for what you can give. Thats oneday. You are young enough to start a new life. Learn from this. Be more choosy next time and only give yourself to someone that deserves. Right now you have a job todo. Chris.

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