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What are we each entitled to in our divorce settlement?

What does the law say about how to split the house, how to share pensions and other assets, and how much maintenance is payable.

What steps can we take to reach a fair agreement?

The four basic steps to reaching an agreement on divorce finances are: disclosure, getting advice, negotiating and implementing a Consent Order.

What is a Consent Order and why do we need one?

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Advice on to be petitioner or respondent

  • Poppy P
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30 Aug 12 #352739 by Poppy P
Topic started by Poppy P
Hi all

I am asking on behalf of a friend - hope that''s ok.
He is 46 his wife 57
They have been separated for 1 year, daughter 20.
He moved out of home and renting.
The wife wants him to enter into Deed of Separation and wait 2 years to divorce. He initially said ok. Now he has said he wants a divorce and has asked her if she would like to Petition or should he. No response. Now the wife has instructed a solicitor who has written to him stating wife expected Deed of Separation etc, please confirm. If in the unlikely event that he doesn''t agree please write back to them so their client can consider her options.

My views are, why waste time and ££ on Deed of Sep if divorce is what he wants. Is it best for him to petition? Will he have to pay her solicitor costs if he is the respondent? He has no problems with paying for actual filing of the divorce papers. Since leaving, he has paid half of the mortgage and half of all bills at the FMH and pays half of all daughters costs.
Thank you for reading

  • Elphie
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30 Aug 12 #352753 by Elphie
Reply from Elphie
As far as the divorce goes, it is usually considered best to be the Petitioner as you are then in control of the process and timing, filing for each stage. If divorcing after 2years with no blame it is usual for parties to split costs equally. Although - if he is suggesting an immediate divorce, is he suggesting divorcing on unreasonable behaviour? In which case it is possible to agree the grounds before sending the paperwork to court, and still agree to split costs equally. However, it is also possible for the petitioner to apply for the costs to be paid in full by the respondent. The petitioner pays all costs upfront, and waits for the order for costs to be paid by the other party. (also, costs means the costs of the court, not all your solisitor costs in writing letters, advising you, etc, each party will pay their own solisitor,s costs.)

The finances - what happens to the marital home, who pays for what, etc - is done separately, usually between the decree midi and the Decree Absolute.

  • Poppy P
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30 Aug 12 #352769 by Poppy P
Reply from Poppy P
Thank you Elphie.
Yes he would be stating Unreasonable behaviour though she may Petition for adultery. He is happy to pay the costs but not all her solicitors fees.

  • Poppy P
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03 Sep 12 #353657 by Poppy P
Reply from Poppy P
My friends STBX wifes solicitor has now written stating she will Petition. They have attached a confession statement which asks him to admit adultery. They have also stated that their client is entitled to ask the judge to make a costs order for their fees plus Court fees. Please confirm. How likely is a judge to award solicitor costs as well. Also is the Confession Statement a normal part of the petition?
Thank you.

  • Crumpled
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04 Sep 12 #353686 by Crumpled
Reply from Crumpled
Hi it is not unusual for the Petitioner to claim costs of the divorce if the grounds are adultery or unreasonable behaviour.
The confession statement is the normal process if the petitioner is citing the grounds of adultery as without it it is difficult to prove as you need a lot of evidence such as a child from the adulterous relationship,signing a confession statement will not have any impact on the financial settlement.
Citing adultery (if that is what has happened)can be a more straightforward and actually potentially less contentious way of going than Unreasonable Behaviour as with UB you have to list four or five examples of the UB with a paragraph or so of examples.
I would suggestif it is adultery and he wants a divorce he signs the confession statement and they just get on with it.....

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